Shower Thoughts

All Photos 13 hours ago
Humans with siblings have better survival skills because they've had experience in physical combat, psychological warfare, and sensing suspicious activity via interactions with the other spawns of their parents.
@elonmusk @paraga Yep, they should, but they won't. I just wrote a thread where I answered @paraga point-by-point. Twitter methodology is weak and inaccurate; furthermore, I shared a quick technical comparison of bots detection with Instagram and TikTok. Pls Parag don’t ban me 🤣…i
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Psychiatrists are technically human tech support.
@elonmusk @EvaFoxU @SECGov They created a metric that lacks the principles of transparency and accuracy. Twtr considers multi-accounts run by a single as multiple mDAU + consider the geo location of an account using just the data from its registration. This data from Twitter's SEC filing is NOT reliable
Retweeted by Shower Thoughts
You’re crazy if you DON’T talk to your dog.
money can't buy happiness but poverty can't buy anything.
Based on how much you can bond with someone by hating the same thing, a dating app based on dislikes would probably be fairly successful.
Everything inhumane has been done by Humans.
Not being able to sleep due to stress stresses you even more.
People love listening to/watching rainfall because they’re not out in it. Some survival gene is probably really satisfied to be safe and warm and rewards us for being out of the inclement weather.
There are very good odds that you've never been naked for 24 hours straight in your life.
Okay sounds happier than ok.
We’re just too calm about the fact that parrots can talk.
We are all mature adults until someone brings out bubble wrap.
When you bite your tongue by mistake it really hurts but if you bite it on purpose it doesn't. Also, you just bit your tongue.
Working your whole life just to enjoy few years when you are close to death is one of the biggest scams.
May is rough because it's the month you realize it's not seasonal depression.
Women might see more human blood in one year than a man could in his lifetime.
Being dumb makes life harder, but playing dumb makes life easier.
Being alone and feeling alone are two different things. right?
You have survived another week. Forgive yourself for any shortcomings. Just focus on relaxing and enjoying the weekend. You’ve earned it.
You don't miss your childhood. You miss the innocence and ignorance of the world.
You go to sleep when you don't want to. You wake up when you don't want to. To go somewhere you don't want to be.
Someone has probably had an imaginary argument with you while they were in the shower.
Being wanted is so much better than being needed.
People wearing pajamas in public have either given up on life or are living it to the fullest.
Someone you haven't even met yet is wondering what it'd be like to know someone like you.
Validation is a hell of a drug.
Being new at a job feels like you're a new character on season 5 of a show.
A lot of single people don’t appreciate that being in a bad relationship can be a lot lonelier than being single.
It's not fair that only roosters are allowed to start the day screaming.
You are slowly losing memories and you can't know what ones.
There's no real reason why the standard amount of toast is 2.
People in movies quit jobs like they ain't got any bills to pay.
Girls have to kiss a frog to get a prince, whereas guys just kiss a princess to get a princess. Seems like an allegory for women-led to believe that they can change a guy, whereas girls are supposed to just be perfect from the beginning.
Being poor is expensive.
When sleeping becomes a reward rather than a punishment, you've grown up.
The two worst feelings in the world are not having a job and having a job.
Blankets don’t warm you up. You warm up blankets.
Numerous people have met a version of you that isn’t you anymore.
It's possible that someone somewhere is describing your personality and features as their perception as the ideal soulmate.
One of the more realistic things about Monopoly is that you can buy yourself out of prison with enough money.
You don't know what your pet named you.
Something small you said may have changed the whole direction of a person's life.
People with great imaginations are cursed because they can imagine horrible things.
When you order a pizza you've become an NPC because you have just given an adventurer a fetch quest with the promise of coin upon completion.
Pandas are puppy software running on bear hardware.
It’s considered less taboo to constantly pump yourself full of a liquid stimulant drug to keep yourself awake throughout the day rather than laying down for a quick mid-day nap.
If you were born in Bosnia in 1902 and lived for 100 years, you would have been Bosnian then Austrian then Yugoslavian then German the Yugoslavian with a Soviet flavor, and the Bosnian again.
We are the last generation that knows what life was like before social media.
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