.:RiotGrlErin:. (COMMISIONS OPEN)

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I’m the baddest bitch at this over 50 water aerobics class.
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i’m the vespa parked in a parking spot so it looks empty of people.
Like this tweet if you don't dump your cooking grease down the sink. Trying to prove a point. Bonus points for comments about what you do with it.
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Costco has Plan B for $8 and you can get 2 at a time. No membership needed
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*changing sex positions* now let’s do a silly one
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the doc i work with told me i was the most professional nurse he has ever worked with & it’s clear this man has not seen my twitter account
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My kid has 898 Pokémon characters memorized but he has no idea where his shoes are
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The only thing that can stop a bad guy with *finger guns* is a good guy with *finger guns*
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I miss my old energy like damn i was so happy before.
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a fall out game boy: thread
when the queen takes her makeup off at night she turns into a corgi.
🏆 THURSDAY CONTEST 🏆 This week's theme: QUEENS Max 3 entries per person. Tweet must be👑🔥👑NEW👑🔥👑(created today). Open to all size accounts. Loads of judges, with tweet reads, TL crawls, listed in bio and more as prizes. ENDS AT 10PM EDT *Hate speech will be DeVcZVzz
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Not to brag but I just filled up the gas tank and doubled the value of my car
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Thoughts and prayers for my starving teens suffering from fridge and pantry blindness
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babe I can't tonight, I'm going goblin mode on this a la mode
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idk lois lane seems like a shitty reporter.
i wish i came back from vacation shredded like tom hanks did in castaway.
I took a nap and woke up to the world ending. A thread.
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how about we make this radio shack a radio home.
when i’m feeling flirty on a date i just comb my hair with a dinglehopper like ariel.
NEW MERCH ALERT!! @kryzazzy has been working hard on our new line and it’s dropping today! Check it out now! terribleplanet.com/merch
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updating wikipedia pages should get you some kind of degree this day and age.
i would rather be hannibal lecter’s dinner than look for love on tinder.
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i would rather be hannibal lecter’s dinner than look for love on tinder.
ursula taking ariel’s voice after recent events hits different.
gently sips soup from spoon. “i’ll take the pot”. the waiter nods.
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Women have been stealing your hoodies since 1304
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Going to McDonald's to order a slightly bemused meal
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Depressed rooster merely noting sunrise in his journal.
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Sorry I accidentally blocked you; I was only trying to mute you and your stupid tweets.
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I was an 8 but now I’m a 5 because depreciation is a bitch
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Sorry I’m late I was enjoying not being here
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