.:RiotGrlErin:. (COMMISIONS OPEN)
43,811 followers
James Flanders 
Abdul Noormohamed 
Mike Shell 
I’m the baddest bitch at this over 50 water aerobics class.
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i’m the vespa parked in a parking spot so it looks empty of people.
Like this tweet if you don't dump your cooking grease down the sink. Trying to prove a point. Bonus points for comments about what you do with it.
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Costco has Plan B for $8 and you can get 2 at a time. No membership needed
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*changing sex positions* now let’s do a silly one
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the doc i work with told me i was the most professional nurse he has ever worked with & it’s clear this man has not seen my twitter account
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My kid has 898 Pokémon characters memorized but he has no idea where his shoes are
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The only thing that can stop a bad guy with *finger guns* is a good guy with *finger guns*
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I miss my old energy like damn i was so happy before.
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when the queen takes her makeup off at night she turns into a corgi.
🏆 THURSDAY CONTEST 🏆
This week's theme: QUEENS
Max 3 entries per person. Tweet must be👑🔥👑NEW👑🔥👑(created today). Open to all size accounts. Loads of judges, with tweet reads, TL crawls, listed in bio and more as prizes. ENDS AT 10PM EDT
*Hate speech will be DeVcZVzz
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Not to brag but I just filled up the gas tank and doubled the value of my car
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Thoughts and prayers for my starving teens suffering from fridge and pantry blindness
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. babe I can't tonight, I'm going goblin mode on this a la mode
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. i wish i came back from vacation shredded like tom hanks did in castaway.
when i’m feeling flirty on a date i just comb my hair with a dinglehopper like ariel.
NEW MERCH ALERT!! @kryzazzy has been working hard on our new line and it’s dropping today! Check it out now!
terribleplanet.com/merch
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. updating wikipedia pages should get you some kind of degree this day and age.
i would rather be hannibal lecter’s dinner than look for love on tinder.
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. i would rather be hannibal lecter’s dinner than look for love on tinder.
Tweetariffic! Such good words. @RiotGrlErin was trophied by @trishimal25. Dios mio! twitter.com/RiotGrlErin/st…
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. gently sips soup from spoon. “i’ll take the pot”. the waiter nods.
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Going to McDonald's to order a slightly bemused meal
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Depressed rooster merely noting sunrise in his journal.
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Sorry I accidentally blocked you; I was only trying to mute you and your stupid tweets.
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. I was an 8 but now I’m a 5 because depreciation is a bitch
Retweeted by .:RiotGrlErin:. Sorry I’m late I was enjoying not being here
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