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Best Drunk Tweets!

They always ask “who’s a good boy?” but they never ask “how’s the good boy?”
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Finally the NFL shows respect for the troops.
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when u and ur friend both fuck up but at least ur in it together
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Back when the president didn’t mind if you took a knee...
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Ever heard of elf on a shelf? Nah it's all about
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Unlike all these peasants, I get my news from a reliable source...
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I tell all my hoes rake IT up, Break IT down, bag IT up, Fuck IT up, fuck IT up, Bag IT up, bag IT up Rake IT up, Rake IT up
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Me creating new accounts to get one month free trials
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Remember Stephanie from Lazy Town? This is her now, feel old yet?
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This is Jimmy Nuetron after doing one marijuana. Still think it's no big deal?
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