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The Onion
satire comedy news humour 6,043,735 followers
Maybelline Introduces New Ideal-Woman Rubber Mask To Use In Place Of Makeup onion.com/1pJPlDp pic.twitter.com/C5fv4q1eO3
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Psychology Comes To Halt As Weary Researchers Say The Mind Cannot Possibly Study Itself onion.com/1pJOsuu
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"Individuals do not need to exercise very much to increase the number of years they live in dull, aching pain." onion.com/1pJNYVg
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Amazon says their newest Kindle perfectly replicates the experience of reading a real book in public for attention onion.com/1pJLl5G
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Red Robin takes the prize of single unhealthiest meal in America avc.lu/1pu0WZY
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[American Voices] “I’m just excited that Star Wars might feature two puffins going at it in the background.” onion.com/1oa4H79
Caught On Tape: Did Orlando Bloom Bully A Weak, Defenseless Child? clickhole.com/r/666tsd pic.twitter.com/8NRqnN1eYq
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CON: Have to perfect the forced smile that accompanies choking down tempeh onion.com/1o9Zr3t pic.twitter.com/vPJnITj2iq
Report Finds Children Of Parents Often Become Parents Themselves onion.com/UOtAK4 pic.twitter.com/G1bnyEGmDO
Full report at theonion.com
I've been naked since the premiere of @DatingNaked. It's been interesting. Tune in tonight for a brand new episode!
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Experts Warn Situation In Gaza Will Get Worse Before It Gets Much Worse onion.com/UOouxe
.@Maybelline: "You’ll easily achieve a look that would have otherwise taken hours to create." onion.com/UOly3I pic.twitter.com/24Qsf7x2W3
"All I need to do is yank this over my head, and that's it. I'm conventionally attractive." onion.com/UOitAG pic.twitter.com/iO35H0aCxz
Report: All Things Aside, American Flag Still Looks Pretty Good Majestically Billowing In Wind onion.com/UOhbG1 pic.twitter.com/IRGlVMqQXk
Faith-based alternative to Fifty Shades Of Grey to put God deep inside you avc.lu/WPCZTv
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Motorcyles make turning enemies (like the boss' son) to friends pretty easy @HondaPowersprts onion.com/1pThZDE pic.twitter.com/GWR5wgom9N
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STATSHOT: Why Are We Cutting Our Trip Short? onion.com/1oRlfl0 pic.twitter.com/p8wxHql4dU
Psychology Comes To Halt As Weary Researchers Say The Mind Cannot Possibly Study Itself onion.com/1lgnWrm
Remember Tetris? One lucky fan got to experience it for real clickhole.com/r/641tsd #TBT pic.twitter.com/diHZtTLsr3
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GlaxoSmithKline Releases New Drug To Treat People Who Just Feel Sort Of Weird Sometimes onion.com/UNZxlu pic.twitter.com/K7ZmVY9X7M
"Getting off the couch once a day may give you one or two more years of clutching at your lower back and wincing." onion.com/UNWPg1
New Study Finds Running For 20 Minutes Each Day Could Add Years Of Soreness To Life onion.com/UNUzoQ pic.twitter.com/9rJ7YsqSZd
Last century’s Batman films now look like blockbusters from another dimension avc.lu/1qs4QkT
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