Browse Guide VIP Promote
Login / Help
Grow Your Twitter Audience - Free!

The Onion

satire comedy news humour 4,936,844 followers
Share this page  
The Onion @TheOnion
Week In Review: Gay Scouts Forced To Wear Special Merit Badge onion.com/14ZThrb
  10h
The Onion @TheOnion
Vice President Biden Investigated For Questionable Workers' Comp Claim onion.com/18c6txv
  11h
The Onion @TheOnion
Dr. Good has everyone in the studio audience getting shots of all kinds. Don't ask questions, get more shots! youtu.be/4tUz0sq-BVs
  11h
The Onion @TheOnion
#XBoxOne Capable Of Controlling Users With Simple Voice Commands onion.com/14ZAdsZ
  12h
The Onion @TheOnion
10 Things You HAVE To Know Before ‘Arrested Development’ Returns onion.com/16TIEdw
  13h
The Onion @TheOnion
Obama Lays Out Plans For Drones That Taze Americans Rather Than Kill Them onion.com/Z40jKy
  14h
The Onion @TheOnion
Why is Tara Reid talking to Tim Allen, and what does Mark Wahlberg have to do with it? onion.com/11945EF
  17h
The Onion @TheOnion
New YouTube Original Series Stars Paul Giamatti As Turtle Who Fucks Shoes onion.com/19VTw7B
  18h
Hammond Morris @OnionAdCzar
These two YouTube sensations are sure to be the talk of #ComedyWeek onion.com/14CTG31
Retweeted by The Onion
  18h
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] "As a great man once said, mission accomplished" onion.com/13QJHI2
  18h
Hammond Morris @OnionAdCzar
It’s time to #FaceTheRed and kick student debt’s ass. Watch @SALT_Money’s new horror movie to learn more: bit.ly/FaceTheRed
Retweeted by The Onion
  18h
The Onion @TheOnion
2004: World leaders meet to discuss moral ramifications of drone warfare, decide it’s fine | War On Terror Timeline onion.com/14ZZV0l
  18h
The Onion @TheOnion
Here Is The Onion's Timeline Of The War On Terror onion.com/14ZYlvu
  18h
The Onion @TheOnion
Boy Scouts of America leaders call new special merit badges for gay scouts "a tremendous step forward" onion.com/14ZUzlK
  19h
The Onion @TheOnion
[Onion Review] Gay Scouts Forced To Wear Special Merit Badge onion.com/14ZThrb
  19h
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Human Centipede 3 begins filming, plans to sew 500 fake prisoners together avc.lu/13QtKS0
Retweeted by The Onion
  19h
Hammond Morris @OnionAdCzar
.@netflix heard your anguished cries and brought back Arrested Development. Your suffering ends May 26th bit.ly/YRBBPJ #AD2013
Retweeted by The Onion
  19h
Onion Sports Network @OnionSports
Tim Duncan Encourages Teammates To Be Fathers First, Basketball Players Second onion.com/14ZLIRi
Retweeted by The Onion
  19h
The Onion @TheOnion
10 Things You HAVE To Know Before ‘Arrested Development’ Returns onion.com/16TIEdw
  20h
The Onion @TheOnion
XBox One Capable Of Controlling Users With Simple Voice Commands onion.com/16TDCxu
  20h
The Onion @TheOnion
Could this new #XBoxOne feature change videogames forever? onion.com/14ZAdsZ
  20h
The Onion @TheOnion
Weekend Magazine: How One Man Defied The Critics Who Said Large-Breasted Models Couldn't Sell Funny T-Shirts onion.com/13QqSom
  21h
The Onion @TheOnion
Obama Lays Out Plans For Drones That Taze Americans Rather Than Kill Them onion.com/Z40jKy
  21h
theonion @theonion
Full report at theonion.com
  21h
The Onion @TheOnion
Boss Born In 1991 onion.com/13Qm9TF
  21h
The Onion @TheOnion
Everyone in the studio audience is getting shots of all kinds on Dr. Good. Don't ask questions, get more shots! youtu.be/4tUz0sq-BVs
  22h
The Onion @TheOnion
"The best thing for me to do is take it easy and keep collecting those checks." – Joe Biden onion.com/18c8ABk
  22h
The Onion @TheOnion
Biden Investigated For Questionable Workers’ Comp Claim onion.com/18c6txv
  22h
The AV Club @TheAVClub
Unsurprisingly, Lena Dunham isn't super stoked about the existence of that Girls porn parody avc.lu/133hv2t
Retweeted by The Onion
  22h
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus | Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of Latest "Fast And The Furious" Sequel onion.com/Z5hPyb
  22h
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] “Big deal. I was in the scouts 30 years ago and was gay as gay can be.” onion.com/Z5cg2F
  23h
The Onion @TheOnion
‘Seems Fair To Me,’ Man Says To Friend Totally Screwing Him On Restaurant Check | More Dining News: onion.com/14HKzOD
  23h
The Onion @TheOnion
In Focus: Area Man's Quirky Hobby Kills 27 onion.com/10SKJyM
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
The Events Depicted In ‘Star Wars’ Actually Happened To Me | Commentary By George Lucas onion.com/10Pqmlh
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
9 Jennifer Lawrence Photos That'll Make You Reassess The Scope Of The 1986 Vienna Convention On The Law Of Treaties onion.com/10Pru8s
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
Study: Anxiety Resolved By Thinking About It Real Hard onion.com/13OlfqG
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
Obama Aims To Limit Civilian Casualties With Switch To Taser Drones onion.com/Z40jKy
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
Gummi Bear Emerges From Digestive Tract Unharmed onion.com/10PrjKh
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
In Sports: Dwight Howard Interested In Ruining Rockets onion.com/10PrdCn
  24 May
The Onion @TheOnion
The Least Effective Cat Calls onion.com/10PraXk
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
"I’ve been looking for a second thing to get mocked for, and Boy Scouts seems like a great fit." – Gay kid onion.com/13Oi02p
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
BREAKING: Gay Kid Excited To Be Made Fun Of For Second Thing onion.com/13OhKRg
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
Facebook Post Of Webisode Receives Staggering 15 Likes onion.com/14CTG31
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
If we get 10 million clicks on this piece of sponsored content, we will finally reveal the secret to immortality onion.com/12za1nk
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
[American Voices] “Ha. At that rate it’ll take forever to kill all of us.” onion.com/ZgO6EA
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
"Han Solo wasn’t actually named 'Han Solo,' for example. His real name was Doug Solo." – George Lucas onion.com/ZgLl6k
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
The Events Depicted In ‘Star Wars’ Actually Happened To Me | Commentary By George Lucas onion.com/121XGwQ
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
Restaurant's Extreme Burger Challenge Moved Down To Regular Menu onion.com/130fTX1
  23 May
The AV Club @TheAVClub
“I’ve made a huge mistake!”: 13 Arrested Development quotes to summarize reactions to the new episodes avc.lu/ZenBQ7
Retweeted by The Onion
  23 May
The Onion @TheOnion
.@OnionSports examines notable moments from David Beckham’s illustrious 21-year career onion.com/13MHF8o
  23 May

Twiends uses the Instagram™ API and Twitter™ API and is not endorsed or certified by Instagram or Twitter. All Instagram™ logos and trademarks displayed on twiends are property of Instagram. All Twitter™ logos and trademarks displayed on twiends are property of Twitter.