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The Daily Show
televisioncomedy 2,856,969 followers
#TDSBreakingNews Koala chlamydia vaccine a success. Koalas celebrate with romantic eucalyptus dinner and all-night orgy.
Extended Interview: Texas Congressman Joaquin Castro on.cc.com/1zg9JVX
Tonight: Jon welcomes Austin native Ellar Coltrane from the movie"Boyhood" 11/10c. #dailyshow #southbysouthmess
#TDSBreakingNews Taco Bell launches new ordering app. Michelle Obama packs her things, says "f*@# this," and hits the open road.
Tonight! We didn't need to go to Austin to keep it weird. These midterms have been weird enough.
#TDSBreakingNews Pope Francis: God isn't "a magician with a magic wand." He's a guy with a long beard sitting on a cloud throne. #Duh #Obvi
#TDSBreakingNews Baby wipes recalled over bacterial contamination. But what are babies gonna do, cry about it? #ManUpBabies
The Daily Show kicks off its week in Austin, Texas. on.cc.com/1FTB421
#TDSBreakingNews Vatican digitizing thousands of rarest texts. Also inserting sexy vampires and wolves, so kids will read them.
Tonight! Everything's bigger in Texas! Except The #DailyShow, that's still just 30 minutes.
#TDSBreakingNews Justice Alito denied brunch by hostess who didn't recognize him. Reached for comment Alito sobbed, "brunch is for a-holes!"
Tonight: The Daily Show is all new from Austin, Texas! Jon welcomes gubernatorial candidate Wendy Davis. 11/10c.
#TDSBreakingNews Chocolate found to improve memory. A jealous vanilla quickly forgets why it was jealous.
Tonight: The Best F#@king News Team takes its show on the road to Austin, Texas! #southbysouthmess 11/10c on @ComedyCentral
Tomorrow! Austin! The Best F@?!ing News Team eats The Best F@?!ing Barbecue!
Correspondent Central presents The Best F#@king Improv Show Ever! on.cc.com/1nz0AU8 #DailyShow
Democalypse 2014: South By South Mess -- The #DailyShow is all new, all next week from Austin, Texas!
#TDSBreakingNews First 'dead heart' transplant a success. Great publicity for the 5 emo bands named "Dead Heart Transplant."
Monday! TDS in Texas! The best thing to happen to Austin since... whatever great thing they hosted last weekend.
Enter to win a tour of The #DailyShow and your very own taped interview with Jon Stewart: bit.ly/YcsWbS
#TDSBreakingNews Largest sunspot in more than 20 years facing Earth. "I'm having trouble seeing it," reports idiot staring at sun.
#TDSBreakingNews Rep. Steve King: I "don't expect" to meet gays in heaven. Someone get this guy a heart and a ticket to "Angels In America"!
The Daily Show is taping in Austin all of next week! Speaking of, we need a place to crash -- any Austinites have, like, 80 couches?
#TDSBreakingNews Patients avoid Dallas hospital that treated Ebola patient. Prefer to stick to hospitals where no one has ever been sick.
#TDSBreakingNews Dogs catch another White House fence jumper. His first mistake: the frisbee disguise. #ItAlwaysWorkedBefore
#TDSBreakingNews Swiss company apologizes for 'Hitler' creamer. Also apologizes for calling Half & Half "dairy miscegenation".
Jon to Bill O'Reilly: "I want you to admit that there is such thing as white privilege." on.cc.com/1w9f39T
Democalypse 2014: South By South Mess -- The #DailyShow is all new, all next week from Austin, Texas!
Next week: The #DailyShow is all new from Austin, Texas! #southbysouthmess
We're playing on @TheDailyShow with Jon Stewart on Oct 30. This is a big deal!
Retweeted by The Daily Show
Correspondent Central presents The Best F#@king Improv Show Ever! on.cc.com/1nz0AU8 #DailyShow pic.twitter.com/aqF6OsJcMO
#TDSBreakingNews Spanish nurse cured of Ebola. Doctors prescribed dancing flamenco on plates of tapas during siesta. #ThingsWeKnowAboutSpain
#TDSBreakingNews McDonalds profits plummet 30%. Hamburglar forced to steal burgers to survive instead of just for the thrill.
#TDSBreakingNews Chris Christie: 'I'm tired of hearing about minimum wage'. Suggests we seek surgical solution to wage gap.
Next week: The #DailyShow is all-new from Austin, Texas! #southbysouthmess
#TDSBreakingNews 2nd Royal baby due in May. Looks forward to suckling on hired commoner's teat. #YesAllPrinces
#TDSBreakingNews Obama makes campaign appearance, people leave early. In their defense, nobody cares about Obama anymore.
The #DailyShow has a podcast? It does. Five episodes so far. Catch up with 11 different hilarious hosts: on.cc.com/1ujbfo2
#TDSBreakingNews Peyton Manning breaks touchdown record. A useless Brett Favre shot into cold vacuum of space.
In Florida, Charlie Crist uses @CCristBallFan during a debate. Rick Scott refuses to attend. on.cc.com/1vn956r
Tickets for "@TheDailyShow Podcast without Jon Stewart" are now on sale! 1/10 8:30 $20 (proceeds go to charity!) brownpapertickets.com/event/905089
Retweeted by The Daily Show
Sam Brownback's Conservative Kansas Experiment on.cc.com/1sPcB8w
Enter to win a tour of The #DailyShow and your very own taped interview with Jon Stewart: bit.ly/XGfOvo
"I've fired over a thousand people - easily." - @almadrigal #DailyShowPodcast on.cc.com/1ujbfo2
#TDSBreakingNews 'Foreign underwater activity' reported in Sweden. Report by guy who never knew there's a lot of stuff going on under there.
Jon to Bill O'Reilly: "I want you to admit that there is such thing as white privilege." on.cc.com/1w9f39T