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TedInJest
comedy 141,173 followers
Tweeting about the guy who backed into the space in front of me and has his headlights pointed at me probably won't make him turn them off.
Pope Francis: Evolution and Big Bang are real and God isn't 'a magician with a magic wand' metro.co.uk/2014/10/28/pop… via @MetroUK
Retweeted by TedInJest
Their are to many terrible spellors on Twitter!
Retweet if you think the weekend should start right now.
I'm not sure how integral Calculus was to my education.
What do Amanda Bynes and Lindsay Lohan have in common? Both got mentioned in this tweet.
Holy f***! When did LeVar Burton regain his sight?!?!
I think I'll leave the Halloween decorations up until the end of October.
I only tweet because I lost my TV remote in 2009.
Change is inedible.
I think my avi pic makes me look younger than I am.
TwitPic's archive is still alive: twitpic.com/nllyi
I do not accept the premise that there's a version of Rob Lowe that is not super creepy.
Or escaped convicts RT @TedInJest Pittsburgh Bumble Bees leading early.
Retweeted by TedInJest
Pittsburgh Bumble Bees leading early.
The Very Best of Cream [Full Album]: youtu.be/OteeOkQeMCk #RIPJackBruce
RIP to Cream's Jack Bruce. Many aren't aware his Things We Like gave many a hip hop head gem after sample gem for early 90s #BornToBeBlue
Retweeted by TedInJest
B.L.T. (Jack Bruce, Robin Trower, and Bill Lordan) - "Into Money": youtu.be/hcwKFjCerGc #RIPJackBruce
Jack Bruce, Bassist And Singer For Cream, Dies At 71 | x.co/5hLDq #Healthy
Retweeted by TedInJest
Jack Bruce was a lead singer for Cream. It's odd that most of the death notices refer to him only as the bass guitarist. #RIPJackBruce
Cream - Disraeli Gears [FULL ALBUM]: youtu.be/J1PTrgww3lE #RIPJackBruce
Cream - Making of Tales of Brave Ulysses: youtu.be/sNUYuBk7j7k #RIPJackBruce
Cream - "Tales of Brave Ulysses": youtu.be/S0vHqWGt4NE || #RIPJackBruce
It is with great sadness that we, Jack’s family, announce the passing of our beloved Jack: husband, father,... fb.me/1q5bj4BsE
Retweeted by TedInJest
RIP Jack Bruce
My spice rack is thymeless.
In cooking class at local community center the teacher asked me to name my favorite spice. Thought about it for a second and said, "Sporty."
A long time ago ... George Lucas made films that had nothing to do with Star Wars.
If a jogger runs faster than the speed of sound, can I ask you a hypothetical question?
Well, finding this was certainly a pleasant surprise this morning. Don't mind if I do! #IloveHalloween pic.twitter.com/D833mVgYo8
Retweeted by TedInJest
He said, "My cousin makes a living off of weddings." She said, "Oh, is she a wedding planner?" He said, "No, she's a divorce attorney."
Last night I made a wrong turn in the mall and discovered that Sears still exists.
For Halloween this year I intend to masquerade as a man with a reason. My charade will be the event of the season.
Any relation to Ann Poulter?
Typos drive my nuts!
I just read this news story about Ted Bishop and Ian Coulter ... so now I've heard of Ted Bishop and Ian Coulter.
I bet you don't know what I'm thinking.
My cousin has been dieting for 25 days. She says that she has already lost 25 days.
Team Tavares Keeps the 'Fun' in Fundraising by Holding Yardsale Oct. 24-25 in River Edge 4 Mother with Stage 3 Cancer patch.com/new-jersey/riv…
Retweeted by TedInJest
Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck walk into a bar. They see Goofy and ask him, "Where's Pluto?" Goofy says, "On the edge of the solar system."
OMG! TLC canceled "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo"!!! Now we'll never find out how it ends.
BREAKING: scientists have discovered that Ebola humor isn't even slightly contagious.