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Arrrrrrrr you ready for Talk Like a Pirate Day? I’m ready to hunt for sunken treasure!
Mrs. Puff’s Boating School is expanding! Wait, actually it’s just Mrs. Puff that’s expanding. Now might be a good time to go …
Mr. Krabs told me I’m not only the best fry cook he’s ever had, I’m also the cheapest! He flatters me too much.
Patrick and I are playing Tide and Seek! The tide carries Pat away, and then I go look for him. Hopefully he’s still in this hemisphere.
How many Krabby Patties do we have in our Patty Vault? I’m not supposed to give an exact number, but it’s approximately 10,581.
Surface dwellers have water parks, but down here we have air parks! Or at least we used to. Interest seems to have dried up.
Happy Positive Thinking Day, everyone! It’s the only kind of thinking I know ☺
They say you should eat three square meals a day. Are round meals acceptable?
Mr. Krabs added a drive-through window! Our fast food just got a little faster.
Mr. Krabs told me that money talks, but I haven’t heard this dollar speak all day. Maybe money is shy?
They say a superhero lurks inside all of us. To which I say, finding enough room to lurk inside my body is an impressive superpower.
I only cry if it’s something really sad. Or at a wedding. Or a graduation ceremony. Or if the wind blows. It takes a lot to make me cry!
If you keep at it, someday you too can be like Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy! Perhaps not as heroic, but certainly as old.
How did they catch the criminal mastermind jellyfish? With a police sting, of course! Oh, that one’s so funny it hurts.
Squidward said he’d rather jump in a mud pit than spend another minute with me. He doesn’t have to choose. I can jump in with him!
Squidward cast me in his new play! I’ll be playing the part of “Usher.” Question: when I say, “Here’s your seat,” what’s my motivation?
I think I make a pretty good lifeguard. My body can also be used as a flotation device!
Someday I want to be big and strong, like that guy in the commercial! All I have to do is become a completely different person.
The Invisibleboatmobile is missing! If only we’d seen this coming.
Patrick explained to me that every boat has two sides: this side, and that one. Everything he says makes so much sense.
I just found out that my body hosts millions of tiny bacteria! Welcome, friends! Let me know if you need anything.
Money doesn’t grow on trees. But houses do! I ought to know, I live in one.
Fry Cook Tip #17: when in doubt, don’t flip out. Just flip that patty!
Have I got a kernel of wisdom for you! Oh, wait. Actually this is just a popcorn kernel. Never mind!
They say money doesn’t grow on trees. But they also say it’s the root of all evil. So, does that mean money grows UNDER trees?
They'd need an army to stop me from making Krabby Patties. And after I feed them Krabby Patties, they'll need another army to stop me!
I think of jellyfish as my brothers and sisters. Brothers and sisters who sting, but still, family is family.
I would join ANY club that would have me as a member!
Mr. Krabs says I have to work overtime to pay for all the coral fries Patrick ate. Yay, overtime!
I saw a report on TV that said that everything they say on TV is true. Sounded pretty convincing to me!
I know the customer is always right, but I’ve looked and I just don’t see “Krabby Patty Secret Formula” on the menu. Sorry, Plankton!
Gary is pretty fast, by snail standards. If you watch carefully, you can almost see him move!
Krabby Patties are the best in my book. But books aren’t the best place to keep Krabby Patties! Better eaten than read.
Squidward painted another self-portrait! He is truly an inspiration to himself.
It’s National Relaxation Day, so I’ll be working only half my usual overtime shift! Unless Mr. Krabs needs the buns counted again.
Boy, I sure could use a break ... from waiting for orders! I haven't made a Krabby Patty in nearly thirty seconds.
The grease fire in the Krusty Krab kitchen was bad, but I try to look on the bright side: we found a new way to toast sandwich buns!
At the Fry Cook convention, I'm giving the keynote address! It's challenging to write an entire note on a key.
I’ve learned to just go with the flow. When living in a giant body of water, it’s the best way to be!
I may not have a Boating License, but that won’t stop me from accidentally entering a boating race through a series of misunderstandings!
Have you ever been scared out of your mind? And if so, how did you get back into your mind? Someday I might need to know!
If there’s injustice, call Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy! They may not answer at first. Just let it keep ringing. Eventually they’ll pick up.
Squidward is the best dancer I know! He proved it to me by telling me that he is.
I don’t think a robot could ever do my job. But if it could, then I guess I’d have to become a robot! I’m willing to learn.
Patrick and I just gave Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy’s Invisiboat a fresh coat of paint. It sure feels good to be helpful!
My cousin BlackJack may be big, strong and kind of aggressive, but I don’t find him intimidating at all, as long as he is asleep.
Some say Man Ray is misunderstood. I agree. It can be really hard to understand what he’s saying with that mask on.
I don’t think Plankton is a bad guy. I think he’s a good guy who sometimes does bad things by accident. And wow, is he accident-prone!
An article in the newspaper this morning left quite an impression on me. If you look carefully, you can still see it on my back.
Patrick is such a good driver, he even knows when to drive through a building instead of around it. And now Squidward’s got a new door!