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my upper middle class guilt costume is on point this year.
Ebola nurse checking me out at the grocery store pic.twitter.com/ahY1lGiyjZ
It's my favorite day of the year and I'm spending it at a doctor's appointment followed by grocery shopping. Just put me on suicide watch.
Advice for talking to me : don't
I have a long list of celebrities I think I'd be best friends with if I had the chance to meet them.
Snoop be lookin like the taco bell dog with a face lift pic.twitter.com/gqrCx36tEc
Kathy bates is a fucking gangster #wwhl
Sarah Paulson just said "my womb is quaking" I'm screaming #WWHL
Omg all the ahs girls on #WWHL dyingggggggg
Michael j fox on watch what happens live. Shit is about to get really awkward.
Let's be honest for a second. Dandy just needs a good dicking to knock that crazy out of him. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
That lip bite at the end made my legs weak. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Omg he killed mama patty!!! #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
He can't pick them up you dumb little bitch fuck yo brownies! #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Ryan Murphy can pay for the lifetime prescription of xanax I'm gonna need after this season. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Plot twist: mordrake is actually a plastic surgeon. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Twisty sounds like Patrick from SpongeBob and I can't even.#ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
I'd pay a million dollars to have Jessica Lange spank me #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Holy shit. He just punted her. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
I'm already mad that this episode of ahs isn't an hour and 20 mins. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
When you see your ex with their new bae lookin like... pic.twitter.com/ncv8sQwXuR
I've slept with socks on for the past two nights. This is not okay and is a really big deal. #foreveralone
Is it racist to say "ebola is the new black"?
God's and monsters!? I can't fucking breathe #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Where can I find this viking guy's porno? Like seriously. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Yes viking prostitute can get it. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Miss patty serving up all the attitude #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
I love Emma Roberts but i wound have loved seeing the long Island medium do that same scene. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
"Curfews are for the poor people" #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Pattie labelle as woody woodpecker is EVERYTHING #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
"What a bunch of bunk" is my new favorite phrase. #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
So have we figured out if the person playing the tall woman is actually a woman or a tranny? #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
Living for Emma Roberts' Sci slut chic #ahs #AmericanHorrorStory
#ahs live tweet begin!
it's 2014 where is the six pack pill? i'm done waiting.
i hate myself but i still think i'm better than everyone
everybody's about that gettin high life and i'm all about that gettin pie life
"You are who your friends are" ...so I'm a laptop
Am I the only person who says blatantly mean shit and people think I'm kidding?
it's my birthday. if @MsSarahPaulson wishes me a happy birthday i'll delay my plans to join a clown and help him terrorize a freak show #ahs