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Rufus Hound
.@KelShirl Time on my shoulders... "Morning Parade - Us & Ourselves" youtu.be/zaSPFCS2xbg
Can you please retweet this. Does anyone have any living relatives who served on HMS Mounsey in 1944. My dad is looking for his comrades
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No. Wrong one. Let's try again... " Ah. @KelShirl. What a smasher. #SundayBrunch"
This African geezer on Sunday Brunch. Not a TV natural.
1/2 My wife (@MrsHound) wrote me a card to say thanks for her yoga day today. Totally undeserved after all she does for me/us but nice card!
NHS marketisation: being paid for out of the wages of the workers yet its patient care thats paying the price. To fix: support @nhsbill2015
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Oh. It's like that, is it? Fine.
Professional sports, that's not your team dude, that's a corporation owned by some rich family that does not give a fuck about you.
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Today lets find beautiful soft cuddly Baloo a home?tied 2 r gates 2 days after fire. He gives kisses all day. RT x pic.twitter.com/aypZH11slk
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Join us. We're all sorts of people. Fighting for patients against the stealth sell-off of our NHS nhap.org #cheltlitfest
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Holy shit. My mate @dwynne bought me to a pub in Clerkenwell and they have @lefthandbrewery on tap. This. Changes. Everything.
Does anyone know the Polish for "Stop playing that god awful dance music on your phone. This is a train, not a Malaga disco"?
RE that last RT, Dead Funny is currently 5* rated on Amazon 😊
DEAD FUNNY: HORROR STORIES BY COMEDIANS. Need I say anything more? amazon.co.uk/Dead-Funny-Rob…
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Remember that time a lady gave a tiny man a piggyback on a ferry? pic.twitter.com/Qam0KIyJ1B
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TODAY is TTIP Day of Action. Join in events where you live: shar.es/1mtDx9 #noTTIP
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When I left work, the Seniors Tea Dance was playing Jayne County "If You Don't Want To Fuck Me Baby, Fuck Off" On the organ & Kazoo
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@RufusHound if they don't stop I shall unpack my umpires flags...nobody who has seen them, and understands semaphore has ever survived.
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‘Daddy, can we paint your face?’ ‘OK, what am I going to be?’ ‘A beautiful butterfly.’ pic.twitter.com/TymVFZIkPj
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Every second of this advert for a local Travel Agent is incredible. youtube.com/watch?v=HR3gpq…
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Susan Mitchell UK's First Woman UKIP MP youtu.be/FjR_DO20R60 #sukip ask her a question #asksukip
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@sleafordmods Listening to Austerity Dogs now. Impossible to listen to anything else before or after you as no fucking point. A compliment.
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Lovely to see how many people think I meant that last tweet. #verylowopinionofme
Ladies with papoosed babies, getting on with their lives: We get it. You let some dude screw you. Now, please, quit bragging. Am I right?!
NBC's Chuck Todd on why most people think mainstream media is part of the problem. Rings true goo.gl/6RLjxB pic.twitter.com/SwoL54GEZL
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No. Wait. My bad. It was a deflated Simon Cowell sex doll. As you were.
I've just been sorting out the airing cupboard and think I spotted Kim Jong Un in there. Wedged in behind the boiler lagging. Who do I tell?
Meatz. Boozez. Funz. RT "@beercanchicken1: So great to see our new regular @RufusHound in again last night! pic.twitter.com/5W48QQSEwX"
The people of Clacton have broken the mould of British politics by voting for the same MP they've had for 10 years!
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Farage has UTTERLY no humanity whatsoever. UKIP is a party of greed, fear, bigotry, ignorance and insularity. We won't grow with UKIP.
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Happy Birthday @emily_mallott. May all your dreams come true. Even the one about the monkey and the xylophone. X
Spectacularly strong cocktails @beercanchicken1 w Max. Seriously. Try "One Night in Jail". It's TFU #SpacedReference pic.twitter.com/19XRBhwP1L
.@tkingdoll Surely it's GhostBUSTYers?
By me, quite a lot more personal than usual. Masculinity & how to avoid it. newstatesman.com/culture/2014/1…
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Everyone RTing this, for very good reason. RT @edmorrish: "Grief is the echo of love" - @arobertwebb being amazing: newstatesman.com/culture/2014/1…
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Wow, David Cameron is 48 today. No idea what that is in human years.
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[At dinner w girlfriend's parents] "Watch this" *pretends to play plate like tambourine* *her dad gives her a secret thumbs up but I see it*
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Welcome to Sarcastic Club Im sooo happy to see you all Anyone know the 1st rule? "Be less sarcastic?" Ooo lets have this guy teach the class
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And the award for best neckwear goes to.. Well would you look at that, it's a tie
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911, what's your emergency "I'm masturbating too much" Sir that's not really a problem "one sec. DID YOU HEAR THAT MOM? NOW GET OFF MY CASE"
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I entered #GBBO and my tart made me a finalist! Watch me now or bake your own games.usvsth3m.com/gbbo/#MDA0NDFS… pic.twitter.com/L0q4sv1hNm