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Patton Oswalt
comedian comedy music 1,780,023 followers
Happy Fathers Day to a man who received purple heart during Vietnam. I once won skeeball tournament at Dave & Busters pic.twitter.com/g7c1AMBoqo
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I'm going radio silent until Tuesday, September 2nd. The most recent post on my Facebook will explain why: on.fb.me/1kwgJXj
Gift from a fan. My legacy. My curse. pic.twitter.com/J20Insgrb7
@pattonoswalt greatvset. Just walked past Ryan in the john. Direct quote from him "I almost got stabbed by my ex wife" swear to God.
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90 minutes, Chicago. You were amazing. Wanted to do more but my voice gave out. #iloveyou
Oh wow. This is the short film that the C.O.W.L. comic is based on. Very cool: bit.ly/1kuqIXV
Patton Oswalt Had The Perfect #YesAllWomen Tweet So Of Course Jackholes On Twitter Got All Worked Up uproxx.it/1wIbicG
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People who don't follow @MrGeorgeWallace on Twitter -- why do you bother waking up in the morning?
Shout out to folks makin' love outta nothin' at all. There was nothin' there a second ago then BAM, they're makin' love!
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This country went to hell when kids stopped wearin' those propeller hats. Let's put some damn propeller hats on these nasty ass kids.
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Shout out to glory days, passin' you by in the wink of a young girl's eye and whatnot and such and such.
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SO excited to be on NO YOU SHUT UP this Monday on @ThisIsFusion, with the always brilliant @PFTompkins: fus.in/1gQnP92
In case you missed it, @pattonoswalt made twitter lose its mind again huff.to/1mD64b2
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"Listen. Forget fame & money. Forget the critics. Build that dune buggy for yourself." - from my recent interview in Dune Buggy Magazine.
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Should probably let everyone know -- MALEFICENT started as the KING OF QUEENS movie. Went off the rails in the 3rd rewrite.
Scotch. Juliana Hatfield's HEY BABE playing on the laptop. See you tomorrow night, Chicago. Going to sleep. It's been a day.
I mean, @pattonoswalt and @josswhedon are huge wins for Team Feminist as far as public exposure. And we've made them afraid to say anything.
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@taradublinrocks @pattonoswalt it's not men that are trolling Patton, it's misogynists and boys. Men get it and were saddened by it too.
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