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Patton Oswalt
@pattonoswalt August 6th performance has been rescheduled for October 29th, 2015 due to #Guillermo - #staysafeMaui
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6h
whenever I hear of another big game hunter 'bravely' shooting a wild animal I think of this perfect Far Side cartoon
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35 women speak about being assaulted by Bill Cosby, and the culture that wouldn't listen: nym.ag/1Izta21
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Probably shouldn't leak I'm playing "Young Blob" in X-MEN APOCALYPSE but oh well.
Great save, @realDonaldTrump! The only way you could lose supporters faster is if you inherited them from your dad.
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Comedian @pattonoswalt has been in a ton of TV shows & movies. Tell us your fav to win 2 tix: facebook.com/MahaliaNOLA/ph…
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Auditions for Wolverine's replacement are already underway -> bit.ly/1HkTWUW #ConanCon
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Michael Fassbender to lead 'The Big Lebowski' live-read as 'The Dude': ow.ly/Pg22i
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.@pattonoswalt Hiked to the top of Griffith Park this morning and left his wish. Written on an Egg McMuffin receipt:
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So here it is, another chance...
We're just counting down the seconds till @pattonoswalt assaults us with his Mad Max/The Muthers double @AlamoDC!!
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Join @pattonoswalt for a dbl feature evening of exploitation goodness. 6/16 spr.ly/6017B68yl
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VERY excited for my 2 volume "HOW TO BE A STAND-UP COMEDIAN", coming this Christmas!
had such a wonderful time on my date yesterday I thought it might make a great romance. Look out Nicholas Sparks!
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Patton Oswalt apologizes to Albert Brooks for stealing one of his bits avc.lu/1J5G9Ic
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One more for you, @kurtmetzger. More brilliance from @ShittingtonUK & his indispensible LiarTownUSA Tumblr:
@pattonoswalt Bam! Spider-man cross stitch...you're welcome.
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