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Patrick Star
They say there’s no rest for the wicked. I wonder if that’s true. I’d better sleep on it.
I sure could go for a sandwich. But is there any chance the sandwich could come to me instead?
SpongeBob told me he sleeps better after a hard day’s work. But I’m already good at sleeping, so why mess with success?
I need a firm house made of rock. It’s too easy for me to walk right through other kinds of walls.
Why do people dislike Plankton’s chum so much? It’s technically a food like product.
Some people ask, why do you live under a rock? It’s a good question. I should try living under other things.
All of us get our turn to play the fool, and the non-fool, whatever that is.
If I were the bus driver, I’d have a job by now.
I may not know much about art, but I know you’re not supposed to eat it. And that is why I don’t like art.
You’d think after spending hours on it every day, I’d be better at watching TV. I’d better keep practicing.
I love Glove World! If it were clothes, it would fit me like a … something that fits really well!
How did I get to be so smart? I have no clue.
Don’t cry over spilled milk. That’s just wasting valuable time. If you hurry, you might still be able to drink it!
I don’t understand why Squidward is so upset. I only hopped into his bath to borrow his rubber ducky.
I’m thirsty. Sure wish I knew where to find some water in this ocean.
I’m not much of a reader. Unless you count palm reading. That’s where I write my grocery list, to be read later.
I got backstage passes to the Ned & The Needlefish concert, but I don’t want that. How am I supposed to see the show from backstage?
There are a lot of fish that are smarter, stronger, and more powerful than me. I’m so glad I don’t have to do their jobs.
The Krusty Krab is the best restaurant in Bikini Bottom! I know this because I have eaten at zero other Bikini Bottom restaurants.
Do I consider myself special? Absolutely! I’m just as special as anyone else.
I love amusement parks, but why stop there? We’re thinking too small. I want an amusement nation!
They say money can’t buy you happiness. Happiness must be really expensive if even money can’t buy it!
Some people say I’m not really a deep thinker. That is true. I can only think in the shallow end of the pool.
Happy Independence Day! Today we celebrate when I liberated food from my plate.
Happy Father’s Day to a great dad who taught me so much! I probably should have written it down, because now I don’t remember any of it.
If I could be any superhero in the world, I would probably be the one with the power to sleep a lot.
I'm sorry to have to tell you this @SpongeBob, but I think there's a dragon right behind you!
I sure could go for a sandwich. I just wish I didn't have to go get it. Guess I'll just take a nap and dream of a sandwich.
Let's play "I Win."
A big meanie at the store told me to go crawl back under the rock I came from. How does he know where I live?!?
You can make any park into an amusement park! You just have to be easily amused.
I love a parade! Wait: what is a parade again?
I wish my future self would come back in time to this moment and give me a time machine. Come on, Future Self, don't let me down!
I like playing the drums! Now I finally have a good reason to hit something with a stick.
Some legends are pretty hard to believe. Have you heard the one about land mammals having whole cities of their own? Come on, that's crazy!
The key to meditation is emptying your mind of all thoughts. I'm pretty much meditating all the time.
Mmm, a jellyfish jelly and seanut butter sandwich! I only got stung getting half of it. Who knew seanuts could sting?
Babies have it so good. Nobody ever bottle-feeds me anymore.
We found the lost city of Atlantis! But then, we lost it again. Never mind.
I love to eat vegetables!
Is it possible that not everyone enjoys stink bombs like I do? I'll ask this angry mob that's been following me what they think.
I wish I had a job.
If I were in charge, I would let everyone eat cake! I think then people would be really happy.
We can't let @Squidward move away! He's the center of our neighborhood friendship sandwich!
I wish I were a wizard. Then I could finally get to wear one of those pointy hats. Maybe someday...
I like to think of myself as a hero for our time. And that reminds me, what time is it? I have no idea.
Squidward likes stinky cheese. Do you think he'd like this sculpture I made out of stinky socks? I'm just gonna leave it in his yard.
Mr. Krabs thinks I'm lazy? Yeah, well I think he's...red. And far too energetic! So there!
A moustache is like an eyebrow for your mouth. So why not call it a mouthbrow?
Why do those people from Bikini Top think they're so high and mighty? They're always looking down at us Bottomites.