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Rowan Atkinson
Friday, I've tried to see other days and none compares to you, I love you.
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Just sold a lawn mower on eBay. That will be the last time my neighbor wakes me up on a Saturday morning.
Some people can be described in three words…“Worst Case Scenario”.
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I'm going to rewrite history. History.
Some days it seems like my life is overpopulated with idiots.
I think a woodpecker just called me a paranoid little weirdo in Morse code...
Be careful about making permanent decisions based on a temporary emotion.
Instantly add perfect #meme #captions to any #selfie or party pic. Get this funny app to make everybody laugh >
Dear Friday, I'm ready...
I just burned 1200 calories! I forgot about the pizza in the oven.
Did you ever want to say to someone… "Maybe if we tied a ribbon around your head we could call you gifted."
The only time I talk to myself is when I need expert advice.
Looking for a fun and funny game? Download #Meme Says. You won’t believe your ears. #iphone #ipad #app #ad >
I've run out of pages to colour in, my colouring book... I guess that is enough work for a Friday.
9 out of 10 doctors say that other doctor is an idiot.
It's almost like some people are allergic to intelligence.
Backwards written is this realize to you take it did long how? But not this bit.
If I were a zebra I'd be pretty upset that they didn't name me tiger horse.
Some people’s brains must think its DNA stands for “Do-Not-Activate”
Been laughing laughing at this app all weekend. Download it now and you can thank me later.
Dear Karma, I have a list of people you have overlooked.
Seriously... Turn you and your friends into cartoons! You’ve never laughed this hard. #photobomb #funny >
Happy Saturday! May the only work you do be piecing together last night's partying texts.
Photobombing has gone to the next level. Try eyebombing or facebombing with this #hilarius #photo app ->
Thursday, which translates to “Friday Eve” in Optimisian.
If the world didn’t suck we’d all fall off.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Some people just prove that the earth is probably a mental institution for the universe.
It’s funny... The cards in this video poker game illustrate all my emotions when I play poker. #lol #ad ->
If you always give, you will always have.
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Time is precious… Be sure to waste it wisely.
Sometimes, when I close my eyes… I can't see.
I've decided to get rid of my bad habits. (As soon as equally satisfying, good habits become available.)
Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere.
Sometimes you've got to ask yourself: "Why am I talking to myself?"
Sometimes ya just need a good laugh… Endless laughs available in this hilarious photo app. #smile ->
Before you can see the light you have to deal with the darkness.
In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
Hey Friday! How ya been buddy?
You can only be young once. But, you can always be immature.
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
How did they measure hail before golf balls were invented?
Adorable babies, silly puppies, and funny cats... I bet you’ll love this cute new slots game. #aww #ad ->
You can’t change what you refuse to confront.
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It's a good thing not everyone has a smartphone... Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
I'm really glad we don't have to hunt our own food anymore.... I don't even know where the sandwiches live.