Please upgrade your browser to make full use of twiends.   chrome   firefox   ie   safari  
Want to get more twitter followers? Click here to watch our video.
 
George Wallace
government politics alabama 80,572 followers
It would be less impressive if it was just County of the Apes and it was just one county where apes were ridin' horses and shootin' shit.
Pac-Man is brave as hell. You think I'd stop to eat grapes if ghosts were chasin' my ass?
Shout out to the Salvation Army. They just always show up when the battle is over and so forth.
Shout out to dot matrix. Don't you print shit for me if it ain't dot matrix!
Yes son, there are monsters in your closet. I'm scared so I'm locking your door. If you make it, I'll see you at breakfast. I love you son.
Retweeted by George Wallace
Shout out to The Container Store with the boxes and the bags and the tins and the cans and so forth and what have you.
Cleveland needed LeBron back. Folks were walkin' in that arena ordering hot dogs to go!
Shout out to larks. Making us all wish we were as happy as them and what not.
I have to love my son, no matter what....not. Cleveland? I still love him. What about NYC or LA and so forth
@MrGeorgeWallace Shout out to tomorrows. Without them, shit gets done *today* and so forth.
Retweeted by George Wallace
It's 7:40 AM. I'm at the #1 Popeyes in the world. ATL Airport. Frying chix like there's no tomorrow and what not.
Shout out to the pilot the bought pizza for everybody. Cheap bastard. What about FIVE GUYS or Chic-Fil-A.
Congrats Jimmy Kimmel on becoming a dad...yet agin!
Retweeted by George Wallace
Twitter has asked me not to tweet any topless selfies so I don't crash the site. The good news? Bottomless is still fair game.
Just sayin' we better get out the way when the shit goes down between square inches and cubic feet.
Shout out to Central Perk and all them friends havin' friend talks and enjoyin' hot beverages and whatnot.
Everything is better without a boss.
Retweeted by George Wallace
"A whale ate your butt" "Ms Brady he said a whale ate my butt" (Checks if he still has butt) "Nevermind he made it up" #OverheardAtPreschool
Retweeted by George Wallace
800. 5 8 8 2 Three Hundred Empire. Today.
Wanna apologize for the karate chop I did on @michaelianblack I panicked and karate chopped a karate chop at his stupid face & it was wrong.
I don't usually defend Aerosmith since our big fight but I was there and the dude DID kinda look like a lady.
Stop talkin' shit about my miniature horse "Trudi" she's small but her spirit is huge, Trudi #1, best miniature horse in North America.
Shout out to ladles, handlin' soup & gravy for 10 years now. Salute the ladle, y'all. Like a bowl with a stick on it. Do yo' thang, ladles.