OMG!! Danger Will Robinson…
The human body is 82% water, 10% hummus, 8% seashell. #truefacts
There are people alive today that only know the Flintstones from breakfast cereals & chewable vitamins. #mindblown
Weee wooo so dizzy today.
Mary Baker Eddy was fucking crazy.
I feel strange eating a banana without my dog begging for half of it. I swear need part monkey, part goat and all lump.
Fate = genetics + environmental triggers + random chance.
Ooh, I feel super shitty. Too late in already in my cage, er... Cubicle.
Your friend might be struggling to #StayAlive
, but you can help bit.ly/StayAliveApp #MHAW16 #AlrightMate
Ever get into the shower and forget why you're there?
I'm like heaven to touch. I'm make-believe and floating on a cloud.
keep the water in the tub not on the floor.
I slept almost the entire day. My head is still pounding. This may not be physical.
Bad Ass Dani strikes again. #got
Nothing like a McCoffee on a rainy spring morning.
Here we go... Oooooh that way. I see it. Oh, that's new. Well then. Well then indeed.
Libretto of my life...... Frrrrrrrrt!
I need temporary housing for about 6 months while I find a house and get financed. Must take dogs and cats, North #SalemOr #keizerOr #stat
Now I need to find a place to live. No biggie.
Chore list 📃.... Halfway complete.
Buoy hates the wet ground. #jugsofinstagram #juglife #jugsjugsjugs #pug #jackrussell #mix #dogsofinstagram #yolo
I tweet the most on Thursdays (21%) and the least on Mondays (11%) thursdays, am I right? Fuck you monday, slacker.
People I mention the most: @Krilll_
(3%) cant stop talking to these snuggle bunnies.
People I reply the most to: @Krilll_
(5%), @PEffervesence (4%), @TheZenGardner
(3%) BFFs for ever ... until we die.
People I retweet the most: @GayUpdateBot
(1%) you WIN
Tell me, batman dies doesn't he?
A hard rain's gonna fall.
Folks having a gossip reunion in the middle of the grocery aisles.... Stop it. Psychopaths
Apparently the body shop I went to a couple years ago unplugged some fans and didn't plug them back in... No wonder my a/c was messed up.
They're gunning for me because I brought in two coupons... I just know.... Wait, here's my service writer. What? It's going to be cheaper? 😲