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Dr. Joe Guse
I love living in New Zealand, except for the TV, which is like 20 years behind. I am totally caught up on "She's the sheriff" now though...
Finally finished my latest book. Pretty sure my aunt with the mustache will be the only one who reads it, but still amazon.com/Youll-never-go…
Goodbye Pagliacci. A tribute to Robin Williams. "The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long' joeyguse.com/2014/08/aman-g…
Newest blog post about becoming adjusted to paradise in New Zealand, and resisting the urge to slip backwards. joeyguse.com/2014/08/lost-m…
The full episode of Chris Farley "Hollywood Scandals" I recently appeared on. player.vimeo.com/video/101271888
Check out "Hollywood Scandals" tonight on the Reelz channel about Chris Farley. I'll be on it!! facebook.com/ReelzChannel/p…
Newest essay about my new life in New Zealand. joeyguse.com/2014/06/follow…
Chipotle has a "no gun" policy now & I have to agree. The chaos, the gas, the dim-witted people in the line. It's a recipe for a shootout.
I have to admit, every time I see some duckface making the peace sign in pictures, I really want something non-peaceful to happen to them.
A tribute to my mother and to all the mothers, from me and the rest of us who often take them for granted. joeyguse.com/2014/05/mama-i…
Just read Oprah Winfrey is going to buy the Clippers now. That should just about pop the last artery in Donald Sterling's sickly heart...
Little sad Clooney is getting married. He and I were kind of the last 2 big name bachelors. Hope my "Plenty of Fish" profile still works..
Saw the movie "Divergent' tonight. Solidly below average. Haven't been this upset at a movie since "Breakin 2, Electric Bugaloo" came out
Feel bad Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow broke up. Feel even worse they named their kid "Apple" though I bet that's one sad piece of fruit
Just cursed out my Geico agent for not helping with an accident. Screw them and their British frogs. I felt like a young Erin Brockovich!!
Just read Starbucks is selling booze now. Nice! I like having all my vices in one spot. Maybe just add a red meat carving station now...
Watching the new "Cosmos" tonight. Cool show, but Is it weird I'm a little disappointed he doesn't pronounce Uranus "your anus?"
Newest bog post about the secret worlds of others that we often don't know anything about. joeyguse.com/2014/01/goddam…
Newest blog post about my trip "Under the bridge" (from Red Hot Chili Pepper folklore) while I was in LA. joeyguse.com/2014/03/i-dont…
Good for you Jared Leto. Good for you. I remember when you played that retarded kid who couldn't read on "My So Called Life."
Watching obese people come in and out of a donut shop this morning, I can say without a doubt, that very few Americans "run" on Dunkin
Man I'm getting sick of the Kardashian family's immodesty.Just today I saw a shot of Bruce Jenner out in public without a bra on! No shame
I usually don't watch daytime TV, but this dude Wendy Williams is really making some sense..
Peyton Manning hasn't been handled like this since he and Eli shared bunk beds...
Petition circulating to deport Justin Beiber. Take him back Canada. And take Bryan Adams while you''re at it. Leave the bacon though...
I really hate winter Sundays with no football. I tired to watch Joel Osteen, but I really find his teeth too distracting. #Buhhurtisland
So sick of Justin Beiber news.Wish one of those rugged,square-jawed dudes like Burt Reynolds or Ellen DeGeneres would set this kid straight.
First Miley Cyrus now Justin Beiber. I really worry about the girls of this generation...
Heard 2 people use "hubby" today, & have to admit I briefly imagined I was Darth Vader & could choke the breath out of them with my mind.
After Christmas with my nieces, I'm using wayyy too much "young person" slang. Gotta get it together. Tomorrow is Man Crush Monday!! (MCM)
My newest essay about the struggle with raising families in the age of social media comparisons.. joeyguse.com/2013/12/doing-…
Let the whales run free in the ocean! They weren't meant to be cooped up to entertain fat people wearing fanny packs.. Corinthians 6:16
My annual Christmas essay about the goonies, cynicism, and finding Christmas cheer again. joeyguse.com/2013/12/our-ti…
It's a shitty day to be a gay, atheist, Duck hunter. They must feel so marginalized.
5 year-old kid just now, "Merry Christmas, or Happy Kwanzaa, or Jewish" Very PC for a five-year old...
Text today Me-Hey man, you wanna meet up and watch some of these college football games today? Him- YEA MAN! Totes Mcgoats!! Me- Never mind
I just bought a military grade laser pointer so I can tease my families animals when I go home for Christmas I'm sick of being a victim..
That sinking feeling when fat pants just become "pants." (Sigh) I think I'll go to Walmart and watch the diabetics ride their rascals...
In search of the heart of gold, my annual Thanksgiving musings, (ramblings) joeyguse.com/2013/11/in-sea…
Just had a "Mcrib" for lunch. It's hard to imagine so much anticipation, comfort, and then crippling shame all wrapped up into one sandwich.
Me to kid-How's School? K- Sucked! We sang this STUPID song John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt M-His name is my name too. K-Why do I bother?
Just read there is a massive global wine shortage & frankly I'm concerned. Women my age don't operate very well without wine...
I once got dumped because I wasn't "hawt" like Axl Rose. Nothing lasts forever, in the cold November rain... pic.twitter.com/k3jJaP3rTx
It's hard to take Spongebob seriously when he's complaining about anger problems. Nothing like being a child psychologist on Halloween..
I think they may have rushed this Govt. healthcare website. Start with a Myspace page. Make a few friends. That's what the cool bands do.
It's sad watching heavy people play Candy Crush. If it was that easy to destroy candy, they wouldn't have lost a foot from type 2 Diabetes..
McD's now putting books in Happy Meals. Sweet. Hopefully they're about teenage obesity & finding good sugar-free candy as a type 2 Diabetic.
Airport people with those neck pillows somehow remind me of those dogs that wear those cones because they won't stop licking their crotches.
joeyguse.com/2013/09/ever-b… Some life lessons I relearned on my trip to The Grand Canyon.
I LOVE this fall weather. Tight Jeans, thigh high boots, cozy sweaters that accentuate the bustline.. I like what the girls wear too...