forcing your pet to spend time with you like
I can't wait to use my instant breast lift from @PerfectSculpt
with my backless dresses!
Don't talk to me or my son ever again
when your friend texts you some stupid shit from across the room
"Can you please tell your kids to stop kicking my seat.."
How girls look when they're yelling..
Retweet in 5 seconds for some good luck
when you're home alone and hear a noise
Me: You sure you don't want anything? Her: I ate already.
Me: Last chance
Her: Go ahead I'm fine.
5 mins later:
Basically what it means when left on "Read"
"so what do you like to do for fun?"
me: *tweets about how i wanna die 27 times in a row, fills my tl with depression memes*
person: i saw your twitter, are you okay?
Me: Don't worry about it, just relax
Inner me: Overreact
When your friends don't respond for hours
this is the type of content i like to see on my tl
When you ask your dog wtf they're eating and they start chewing faster
THIS IS WHAT WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR 😍
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what the fuck did i just watch
"Can one of y'all wipe my ass"
I overheard a 5 year old child say today "do they call it sand bc it's in between the sea and the land"
33 years ago today, the breakfast club met in the library for detention.