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ΞSP
comedymovies 9,097 followers
had a terrible first date with a treadmill last night...kept asking me so many personal questions about my height, weight, sex...
forevers are composed of many many nows...
i'm mentally correcting your grammar...brb.
are we so bored of our mundane lives that gossip is the only entertainment left?
sometimes i wonder, do i even make any sense?
one would imagine that after wearing all those blindfolds in Fifty Shades of Grey, someone would hit a piñata..
I'd do anything for love... terms and conditions apply. please read the fine print.
If you get engaged and you and your partner both owns dogs do the dogs become brother and sister or are they married too?
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out searching for new ways to miss you...brb.
I've spent many hours standing at Connaught Place watching traffic. So I am well aware of the nuances of F1.
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the earth is my bed and the sky my roof... ~too drunk to get home
A storm is brewing...
be the kite. just don't start dancing in the hurricane...
If two people travel in parallel lines, they will ultimately meet. Not here, nor there, but in a place called infinity. Or nearest tea Cafe.
Brunch. What weekends were made for...
Dieting is easy: just declare your mouth as a no yummy zone...
Everywhere you go, cricket match post mortem happening. #IndvsAus
Your teeth are like peppermint scented diamonds.
Free New MacBook via the #NewMBGiveaway? COUNT ME IN! Join me, enter here - deals.thenextweb.com/giveaways/the-… via @TNWDeals
Got whatsapp call feature. Feel so powerful now. What do I do with all this POWAAAAAAAH?
Work, sleep, ping GF or watch porn. Decisions, decisions, decisions. #GuyProblems
To fart or not to fart... #GuyProblems
That intricate planning behind a covert arse checking operation.. #GuyProblems
That untimely itch to scratch your balls and you cannot... #GuyProblems
suddenly, i feel young again. and alive...
ιғ ι'м weιrd wιтн yoυ.. ι'м coмғorтaвle wιтн yoυ.
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My mind just came thinking about you.
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Newspapers are proof that there is so much hatred out there. If nothing, at least let us all send some positive vibe out today.
I seriously need to get away from it all. One way trip to Mars sounds so enticing now....
people should come with labels: don't tell me your secret; i've got a twitter account!
If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.. ~ every graffiti artist
daya darwaza tod do... #KatrinaMissing
Business is simple. If you're not making someone a gandu, someone is making you a gandu.
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the good thing about being your own boss is that you may sneak out of work early when you are not looking...
I can't escape your memory anymore than I can escape myself.
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That rare occasion when you really, really want to be wrong.
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Being afraid to sleep for not knowing what tomorrow brings.
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But I ignored my family for you...
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To give 100% of yourself to someone, that's some scary shit right there.
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Live a li(f)e of happiness.
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I'm all tweets and no action.
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I want to make new mistakes with you, not keep repeating the same ones over and over again...
Life's too short to learn German, or keep worrying how your DP might affect the course of human nature.
If you go out looking, you may find yourself trouble, or some deep spiritual thingy. Unlike me, who just found a jelly bean in my belly.
Not to brag, but I'm pretty selective on who rips my heart out.
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Having one of those assine days where my body and mind are floating at two different locations...
Some fires just can't be put out.
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Unlike you, i ignore everybody equally.
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