*Bounces off the booty and into bed*
Goodnight everyone, God bless.
I seriously love you and your tweets all I do when I read them is laugh until I cry😂😂
is too funny
If the person you love ever cheats on you, you gotta see if they can cheat their way outta death too
Holy shit. Your tweets just seriously made my fucking weekend! 👍 ❤
Ladies if ur BF cheats on u stop letting him get off so easily, pour boiling water on him while he's sleeping. Heat up the relationship
Dannn,that was hilarious :)
no way! im jealous now, i love the story things ;)”
No need to be jealous I just followed you 😄
The way to have a long lasting relationship is to be truthful right from the start, tell them if they break ur heart you'll break their neck
i actually love reading your tweets!!
says it how it is💯👏😄”
You'd be surprised how much hate you get for it though Looool 😂
Your girlfriend always gonna have other dudes flirting with her, best make sure you give her a damn good reason not to flirt back
She's about to get fucked up in 3..2..1 😂
If ur white GF starts sayin shit like "fuck with me u know I got it💯" and also says da N word then guess what? She belong to the streets now
's tweets 😂😂😂😂😂😂👌
If you're a dude and you caption one of your photos as "Selfie 🙈🙊" you gay as hell, where is your father?
Some girls will get drunk at a party and suck 3 random dudes dicks but when it comes to a class presentation they're like "I'm shy"
Can't cope with @illestDAN
storys on the tl, hahahaa i died a million deaths😫😂😂😂😂😂😂
White people can never act normal, Nigga think he a character off Assassin's Creed pic.twitter.com/bMesIPtNmU
I'd never get in a relationship with a girl who subtweets everything her boyfriend does wrong, I don't have time for that stress
your tweets 😂😂👌👌
How is Paul Walker tweeting tho? Niggas got Wifi up there with the Lord?
Lord.... Why did you take Paul Walker? Take a nigga like Lohanthony or Lil Wayne
story is the highlight of my day, they're too funny omg
"I'm Bisexual" is just another saying for "I'm a hoe, and I don't care who touches my pussy as long as it feels good"
is basically my all time favorite acc. lmfao
If your white girlfriend starts quoting lyrics from rappers like Gucci Mane and Jay Z in her Instagram photos she belongs to the streets now
If your white girlfriend only watches interracial porn it's only a matter of time before Mandingo takes her from you
tweets are hilarious😂😂
If my girlfriend doesn't get at least 50 Instagram likes on her selfies I'm dumping her, I want other men to be jealous of me
Love a good @illestDAN
If I take a photo with my girlfriend and we don't get 100 likes I'm dumping her
: The devil is still taking lives. 2013 isn't over yet. Be careful”
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL IS THE DEVIL RETIRING IN 2014 OR?
story has me crying right now 😂😂😭. You made my day 👌
Ladies if he pours the milk in the bowl before he puts his cereal in your relationship will probably fail, he dont care about life
That story was soo funny lol @illestDAN
My twitter account the longest commitment I've had in my life Lol
Women doing Christmas shopping reminds me of the hunger games
Waiting all week for @illestDAN
story, they're so funny 🙉
This dudes stories are fucking epic and funny aha @illestDAN
story about this Russian exchange student has me crying😂😂
16. Moral of the Story is to find out whether or not she has a dog before going to her house. Especially if it's Taylor Lautner 😒
15. Russian girls havin a rough nature she does not take the rejection well.. The bitch falcon punches me 😭vine.co/v/hPAxlKI07hO
14. BUT THEN She tried to start having sex with me again, I gave her the "bitch are u serious look" pic.twitter.com/4nzPKgT2oc
13. she called the dog off me in russian, then she proceeded to pour vodka all over my ass because russians think vodka cures everything SMH
12. The pain was unbelievable, as it's teeth sunk into my butt I let out a manly scream vine.co/v/hPPB0jYA2Qp