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Craig Ferguson

comedian comedy 1,666,943 followers
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Great birthday. Chased teenagers off my lawn then went to Walgreens for big robot glasses. Tomorrow facelift & scrotal plumping.
@WilliamShatner: @CraigyFerg looks fantastic for age 70! Happy Birthday!” & you look great for a Québécois. Thanks Bill. #captainmycaptain
@kingsthings: Happy BDay to @CraigyFerg”. Thanks Godfather.
@Arthur_Officiel: @CraigyFerg Happy Birthday from Paris ! Arthur pic.twitter.com/7vfW3ecOQh” Merci mille fois mon ami
Thanks for the birthday tweetiness love everybody and a happy birthday to my pal @bobsaget. #geezerdom
@lyntlove: I wish Craig @CraigyFerg tweeted during his show.” I can’t it’s live. #asliveasanyotherlatenightshow
Another selfie before makeup at the show pic.twitter.com/XT2sHkZUS3
Selfie I took before shaving this morning. pic.twitter.com/IqZapxrW83
@iamalexxworkman: My life consists of work & the late late show with @CraigyFerg I’m sure I used to have friends.” Yup. Me too.
Scotland and the Spring sunshine peeking at each other over the clouds. pic.twitter.com/KikTJ5wmsg
Retweeted by Craig Ferguson
If you're blue and you don't know where to go why don't you go where fashion sits ... pic.twitter.com/QbpgdZA5Kb
A/C in the studio broke & flooded half the lighting rig. Had to move 1/2 the audience to where the band aren't. One of "those" shows. #oy
RT @AngelaKinsey 2 of my favorite tall people I'm in! @rainnwilson @CraigyFerg -The also tall @KarenGillan2 is on too. When u back, Shorty?
On the show tonight the fabulous @OfficialKat took me to task for not following her on the tweetsy. So now I am. #letthecreepinessbegin
RT @astroengine Stunning! RT @thenightskyguy: Tonight: Space Station Passes over Stonehenge and under the Moon. Wow! fb.me/1JlLloYqk.
My heart going out to Boston.
A lovely article about my dear friend and mentor touch.latimes.com/#section/-1/ar…
RT @BanffMedia Craig Ferguson to Receive the Sir Peter Ustinov Comedy Award at BANFF bit.ly/158X3lf. Thanks Canadians. #theyresocute
Doing a little extra work here this week. I'm still in love with Betty White. pic.twitter.com/SnRPiSz0ge
The return of the @DrewFromTV puppet. The spectacular @OfficialJLD & a great band. Really good one tonight. #exceptIamstillinit
I think the guy I saw outside the post office today actually was @GregProops. #thestarstheyrejustlikeus #theygotothepostoffice
Hey @GregProops there was guy on Fairfax today outside the post office who looked really like you. You should litigate. #doppelgänger
Today I'm wearing my glasses that make me look a little like @GregProops. I driving on Fairfax & I SEE HIM ! #spooky #ghostsandshitarereal
Rule 1 for comedians. Don't laugh at your own jokes lest you end up looking like this asshat. #unprofessional m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=7LVW…
At the 3rd tee of the Arran course, Turnberry, Scotland wearing geezer hat. #winning retrohashtags pic.twitter.com/hWkS6wjfSL
I'm in Scotland for a few days. Anything going on in Late Night TV in the U.S.? #congratulationsJimmy
Happy April fish day from Shelbyville. pic.twitter.com/Dmf8fNKyiE
In the interest of clarity and recording options the @stephenfry episode will not air until May. #sweeps #tonightsshowalsogood
The wonder that is @stephenfry in LA so we taped a show to air later. I think he is my favorite chat-ee. #nodisrespecttosexyactressesetc
Oh sharts! Now I'm all paranoid about my teeth. Getting phantom wobbles. Also in my teeth. #jokeformula #tryingtocheermyselfup
Dental hygienist had to cancel. She has flu. I'm so sorry she is sick. #evilcackle #score! #hopeIdontgetawfulmouthdiseasetoday
Ack. Dental cleaning this morning. What's worse, the scraping or the dire warnings about gum disease? #whineybaby #geezerteeth
whosay.com/m/eddieizzard/… @eddieizzard travels the world making people laugh. He's Comedy Bowie #coolerthanallofus
Gah! In my excitement when talking to Jenna-Louise Coleman I mistakenly thought the town of Filey was near Blackpool. It is, of course,not.
After 12 pints of Guinness & dropping acid, leprechauns flew out of my ass. Deets in my new special on @netflix m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=1_qE…
Rumors already swirling in Hollywood that the new Pope will replace Leno on NBC at 1130.
@Aginchi: Watching @CraigyFerg this guy is a genius. Love from The Netherlands!” Finally! Dutch kudos. BTW Dutch Kudos... #doyourownjoke
Fans of Danish philosopher N.F.S. Grundtvig should tune in to the show tonight. #alsotherearepenisjokes #latenightdouchebaggery
New stand up special. Netflix March 15. Includes instructions on how to perform telekinetic clitoral stimulation pic.twitter.com/nqYq3vS5h3
So when are the Oscars this year?
Can't go into great detail but you don't want to miss ANY of my various appearances with @CraigyFerg tonight #Frisbees
Retweeted by Craig Ferguson
@itsmmbenoist: watch @CraigyFerg tonight... This ole mug will be on. He had me laughing like a crazy person.” Oh hush. You were adorable