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Chris D'Elia
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"Can I maybe have some turkey this year?"
Legitimately had to record this 5 times because I couldn't do it without laughing. The acting the guy who gets the gun pulled on him does is without a doubt, hands down, the best acting of all time and I'm not joking. The fucking BALLS on this actor. This is better than any acting on Game of Thrones
When is the last time you made that "brbr" face? Be honest. Don't tell me you brbred if you didn't brbr. #brbr
Done with the flu. Was still ehehe during the flu but NOW I'm ehehehe even more. Can't wait until my LOS ANGELES show at the Wiltern Dec. 13. I have decided to shoot my hour special that night. Come out and be a part of it! Check chrisdelia.com for tickets. #undernoinfluencetour
Hey Lenny Kravitz. You have a goddamn blanket wrapped around your body while you're walking down the street. Naturally, you should remove that blanket because you are not sleeping on a couch. Absolutely never have this happen again and you won't fall victim to #100percentfuckno
Hey guys found an idiot who had cords on his head. He probably didn't know tho because I can say with the utmost certainty that it is 100 percent obvious that you should not have cords on your head at any given time of any day.
Thank you to my most hilarious friend @realnickswardson for coming out and supporting me at my Austin show. Support from friends and other comics you respect yourself means the world. Ehehehehehe til I die (and even after that) #etidaeat #undernoinfluencetour
Texted my parents right before my flight took off just in case anything happens to me they will have something to talk about.
I took this selfie. Me. Not the guy in front.
Today-Sunday. Tickets at chrisdelia.com #undernoinfluencetour
Hey cool but real quick fucking what???
Check out my buddy @fahimanwar on @latenightseth tonight. He truly is so funny. You can see I texted him for support.
The Townsends have officially joined the Cute Army. Armed & ready for Saturday night in Dallas @chrisdelia #cutearmy pic.twitter.com/6ZHZqvO48B
Retweeted by Chris D'Elia
OOOOOOOOOOOOPSIE!!!! LOOKS LIKE WE FORGOT SOMETHING SIR!!!!
STOP SINGING SERIOUSLY ON INSTAGRAM BECAUSE IT IS INSTAGRAM NOT AN INTIMATE CONCERT AND IT MAKES ME ANGRY AND I CRINGE AT YOU IN MY HEART (still ehe though)