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Chris D'Elia
New travel show where I go to all great places that have shitty weather when I'm there. First stop? MIAMI!!!!
Some of these girls on Instagram have literally the DOPEST bros in their pics.
I live an ehehehehehe lifestyle. Do you? #ehehehehehelifestyle
Nobody can fuck with the ehehehehehe lifestyle #ehehehehehelifestyle
When I get upset and my heart hurts it's only for a little bit and then it's ehehehehehe all over again.
Thanks West Palm Beach. Miami tomorrow. 15 cities left. #undernoinfluencetour
I just actually fell down HARD and almost hurt myself real bad and @jasoncollings was SEHCUTE about it he was so worried hahaha. Fuck man.
Hat like this? Interesting! Because of course not!
πŸ‘«πŸ‘¬πŸ‘­πŸ‘―πŸ‘«πŸ‘­πŸ‘ͺπŸ‘­πŸ‘«πŸ‘¬
ORLANDO FLORIDA YOU CERTAINLY SHOWED UP TONIGHT. EHEHEHE FOR LIFE YOU CUTE FUCKS!!! #DELIEVE
This show in UCF is about to go off. These students are on fire. Hi, Orlando (the city, not the guy Orlando who drove me here).
BUT SHE DOESNT EVEN REALIZE SHE IS SWAGGED THE FUCK OUT.
FLORIDA here I come ehehehe tickets at chrisdelia.com
MIAMI, WEST PALM BEACH and TAMPA - see you this weekend. Tickets here chrisdelia.com/#tour #undernoinfluencetour
Layover in Detroit. Finishing "The Purge: Anarchy" on my iPad. Too bright.
It's so weird how all I wanna do is make people laugh. I literally would never fuck again as long as I could make someone laugh.
Tomorrow headed to Charleston SC for one night off before heading to Columbia, SC. Then West Palm Beach, Miami, and Tampa for the weekend. #roadlife #undernoinfluencetour
Happy birthday to my favorite person @mattdelia!
I thought this was a blowjob machine but nothing happened to my penis when I put in in there. πŸ˜”
Annnnnnd 100 percent definitely ship that item and don't have it as a carry-on at the airport
Bye for now Wisconsin. (PS never put this on your head UNLESS you are fucking and are also wearing a blazer)
Absolutely NEVER fuck with me. #neverbackdown #realkarate #absoluterealkarate (photo credit: Daniel Radcliffe)
Milwaukee was awesome. Madison tonight. (πŸ“·: Sara Bill) #UNDERNOINFLUENCETOUR
NEW YORK - tickets at chrisdelia.com
Eh. Seh. Cute. (with @jasoncollings)
"Your phone needs to be in airplane mode during the flight because it doesn't matter at all and we all know you aren't going to do it."
Annnnnd elbow too high for the phone.
Fuck you, Apple. Not til you make me. pic.twitter.com/h7iaWeAO1N
Robert Duvall being s'bitch the way he slaps the car in "Gone in 60 Seconds"!!! Eh. Seh. Bitch.
Me and this little bitch.
Minneapolis, my friend @chrisdelia will be performing in our city this Saturday. Go see him and be nice and then fart.
Retweeted by Chris D'Elia
Milwaukee and Madison WISCONSIN this weekend. Tickets at chrisdelia.com/#tour
Tickets at chrisdelia.com
Hanging out with that baby I found.
True D'Eliever, @Kelseyyo76 got her nails done for my show. Striking resemblance.
Just talked to @chrisdelia on the phone. It was the dorkiest thing either of us had done in like a year and a half.
Retweeted by Chris D'Elia
What about how some guys sing real songs sensually to the camera and post them on Vine or Instagram? Hey guy, you are a woman now.
There's a baby on my floor.
Me and my opener @jasoncollings on my #UNDERNOINFLUENCETOUR. Shows have been so awesome. 20 cities left! Milwaukee you're next.
Annnnd watching hardcore porn.
Pre show. Saint Louis. Ehe.
Finally a picture with something in it more arched than my eyebrow.
Ben Affleck is so handsome and shit that's hilarious. Like some people are so ugly but he's all just like "Yo, I'll fuck that girl".
The WONDERFUL LUXURY of Southwest RECLINING SEATS. THANK YOU SOUTHWEST AIRLINES.
I took this picture and then realized WTF?
Annnnnd not doing anything.