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Prince Charles
Tonight is more than just a friendly game of football. United we stand; the world won't stop for terrorism. #EngvFra
Camilla: "Behave yourself, or say goodbye to the Crown Jewels".
The updated British Royal Family, photobombed by Carole and Pippa Middleton, Gordon Brown and Jude Law.
Every British household should be using one of these. Which one are you? #Britishness
"Everything the light touches, is our Kingdom. Except the shadowy place, that’s Essex".
"Prince William has become a father for the second time. He needs all the heir he can get".
EXCLUSIVE: The Prince Charles Letters.
For Sale. Like new, never used. One previous owner.
Welcome to the world, Princess. #royalbaby
With 28 days still remaining until the General Election 2015, this six year old girl sums up the mood of the nation.
Worst episode of Take Me Out. EVER. #leadersdebate
Richard III's remains have arrived in Leicester for reburial. Having signs installed in his memory. #richardreburied
One's book is available at @Waterstones in Humour, next to Tony Blair's autobiography.
Get some British inside you this Christmas
"Everything the light touches, is our Kingdom. Except the shadowy place, that’s Essex".
That's the Middletons Christmas gift sorted, although not entirely convinced they can read.
Text from Prince William: "Just told Obama where babies come from. Apparently he's never heard of the Royal Box".
One's guide to Great Britishness is OUT NOW. Do your duty, for Future King and Country.
British can form an orderly queue with just two people, until America sods it up. #BlackFriday
Text from Pope Francis: "Early Christmas gift; best thing since the Bible, and Angry Birds".
Lest we forget those who fought for our freedom. In war, there are no unwounded soldiers. #RemembranceSunday
One has provided @StareAtBooks with an exclusive extract from one's new book. Read it here:…
The Queen has sent her first ever tweet. One tried to explain Twitter, but she said she "doesn't follow". Joker.
One's handy guide to Great Britishness is published today: #SuperThursday

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