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My hips are about to be abducted... *waits for aliens to show up*
Best way to get me to cancel zumba class and hold me prisoner in the flat all day? Just send me an email telling me there's shoes on the way
Look at those eyelashes.
Shit yeah, you just can't buy style like this.
Just ate a Pop Tart. Let's just say, some of you were right.
Burning question of the day: Are Pop Tarts as good as I remember them being over 20 years ago? Bought some to find out.
Yep. Definitely a fan of my new Collectif dress.
Some people on the street today look like badly put-together drawings.
Monday Bronwen goes *thump*
Well, ice skating was fun for me, but hell on earth for Murdo.
About to watch 'Katie Hopkins: My Fat Story'. I may get a bit angry.
Got home from a spin class where they made me do squats AND press-ups, to this cooking in the oven. My boyfriend is OSSUM!!!
Basically just inhaled two slices of toast.
Boris the gecko, making a rare appearance on my Instagram/hand.
What do I get for buying Murdo a quadcopter for Christmas? Said quadcopter falling on me from a great height. Ouch! :-P
Hard at work excavating a dino fossil.
Got the big hammer out now...
I got my boyfriend a dinosaur excavation kit as a fun present. He will be occupied for hours.
Self and Murdo sometimes get so happy we forget to eat, leading to emergency 9pm pizza ordering.
Hate soaps at Christmas. So stressful. Just seen Gary Windass get hit on the head with a baseball bat.
Men's Christmas shopping is basically Supermarket Sweep only with less or no talking.
Retweeted by BronwenWinterPhoenix
In retrospect I think Mum's vacuum cleaner would've been better wrapped in its box. Just sayin'...
Retweeted by BronwenWinterPhoenix
me "was I EVER the most beautiful woman in the world?" Husband " I havent seen every woman in the world, how would I know?" #aspergers
Retweeted by BronwenWinterPhoenix
What did I miss, you guys? How was everyone's Christmas?
That's it; I've been away from Twitter far too long.
Mainly because people always buy it for me before I manage to run out of whatever scent the last person bought me. Not complaining.
Hope everyone had a great Christmas. Today it occurred to me that I've never, ever had to buy perfume for myself.
Amazing pop-up Guide to Westeros (GoT). Thanks so much, Catherine!
My lovely boyfriend has given me an early Christmas present... the lurgy.
Watching the new from Glasgow. Horrific. Bracing self for unsympathetic comments from Katie Hopkins as I type this.
Ingesting my boyfriend's hair.
Sorry I've been neglecting the Twitters. I'm back now.
We're getting on like a house on fire, here.
On my own with this delightful chap. We're discussing politics and religion at great lengths.
"See how Santa was able to trim five inches off his belly fat to fit down YOUR chimney this Christmas!"
I almost killed in Primark. Too many fucking people every-fucking-where.
My boyfriend is currently on the sofa in his leather trousers and black t-shirt that says 'I do bad things'... making himself a man-bag.