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The original 90s crew. My brother got his haircut at home. #family #tbt instagram.com/p/84KF0QGt5M_x…
Describe yourself in 5 words. How about "I add ham to salads."
Awaiting the arrival of @WBrettWilson
, Calgary's first Uber passanger.
Sometimes job security means providing your Sportsnet login so your office can stream the game. #jaysrangers
I can't find my lip chap. It must be in the dryer.
One day! Hockey is back! Go Flames! instagram.com/p/8gjZ_rGt3iYd…
Engagement idea: customize a coke bottle with "Share a coke with my fiancée." Make her drink the whole 2 liter bottle to get the ring.
He didn't even do three pumps!! twitter.com/profootballtal…
Thanks for the welcome. And now we've got water on Mars! Do you think they check passports at the border? Asking for a friend.
Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 5 is out and it is so insanely bad and the reviews are hilarious. youtube.com/watch?t=1&v=oR…
If computers were to take over the world, half would bluescreen to death, and half would need to be plugged in at Starbucks every few hours.
As an adult, I feel like I should be able to put a beer into my lunchbag for work and not a single person should bat an eyelash.
I just found out that Arby's now delivers to my house. I'll have to remember that when I want a lukewarm cheese and wet ham sandwich in bed.
On another musical note, Meow the Jewels, the remix album Run the Jewels 2 using exclusively cat sounds is now out. rd.io/x/QcSnpyIBNjg/
I think my favourite album of the year so far is @tameimpala
's Currents. rd.io/x/QcSnpyIEWfQ/
So insanely enjoyable to listen to loud.
90% of my work day is spent minimizing my browser any time I hear footsteps.
Trump supporter: "It's desolate up there in Canada and they've gotta do something to stop them from coming in."
Um I guess we're Wildlings?
Whether Patrick Kane did it or not, he's going to be found not guilty. The only key piece of evidence has been tampered with. It's over.
This is so great! 105 year old man runs the 100 m dash and pulls a Usain Bolt celly vid.me/3sRB #grandpa
Throwback to a perfect bachelor party weekend with the boys! #tbt
Shoutouts to the brown girl on the Spotify "Study Music" playlist def making the mom proud
The show The Voice should be a bunch of scientists sitting in a lab failing at analyzing why Adam Levine's voice is so weird.
Seriously, Adam Levine's voice sounds like he's trying to sing while struggling to tread water at the same time.
Was just asked if everything is alright. No, there's too much Maroon 5 right now.
Alone in a restaurant for lunch. Two Maroon 5 songs came on in a row so I panicked and jumped out the window. I'm fine though. Much better.
Why don't taxi drivers become uber drivers? My understanding is that they would make more $ www1.salary.com/CA/Ontario/Tax…
If I wanted to hear a white dude butcher Taylor Swift songs, I'd give my roommate @AbDaY
5 shots of Jäger. Ryan Adams is a whiny jerk. #1989
He's wearing a dress around his neck. twitter.com/mashable/statu…
Someone at work just said that I don't seem like the party animal type. I think I'm successfully living a double life.
I gave her a jar of pickles and flowers. Do I know how to boyfriend or what? @hollistonlogan
Why do sesame seeds exist? As far as I can tell, their only purpose is to eventually be crumbs.
I can't wait to get the 128 GB rose gold iPhone 6S Plus sport limited platinum jubilee edition black model coupe with a large fries.
I just ate a Cronut aka a croissant donut aka donut Jesus aka the Mila Kunis of donuts, sweet and oddly exotic looking but not really.
I said Good Morning to someone and because it was my first words today, it came out as a meow. I stared at someone and then I meowed at them
withdrawal. A bunch of non musicians forced to play a classic from our favorite band.
seriously guys, where's the backup show?
fuck the weather. Where's the backup show?
Confession: I really like oatmeal raisin cookies. I'm one of those sickos.
I just figured out the key to dieting is tricking your body into thinking that it's full from eating fucking lettuce.
That moment when your morning coffee hits you and you feel so good, you're willing to shove small children in the face to get what you want.
When you are sleep deprived and are expected of creating great things.
Admiring the artisanal flight of jams my lovely girlfriend… instagram.com/p/6_HsaeGt3kWH…
I have a health condition called "Midnight Toquitos."
Fact: I am more excited to eat movie theater popcorn than I am to see most movies. I love me that theater corn than most food.
's score on the 1-10+ Air Quality Health Index scale peaked at 19 overnight. It's currently sitting at 15. bit.ly/1Kk3Z2Q
Pilgrim: I think they want us to build a corn maze!
-How corn mazes were invented
93% of Americas problems can be traced to participation trophies
I'm on a bit of an interview trip. One of the smartest in the game, Kendrick Lamar, great interview on TPAB. youtu.be/AUEI_ep9iDs?li…