It has been 0 days since he stopped obsessing over losing the popular vote.
Aww, I don't think it's *that* bad, @realDonaldTrump @CNN
. It really captures your good side!
In 2017, down with Deplorables and up with
"What did you do on New Year's Day?"
"Oh, you know. Just sat around watching these HILARIOUS commercials."
uhh just putting this out there... but maybe double cherries was a bad idea
It only took me 20 hours but I made a thing! Yippee!
We met 21 years ago today and have been together ever since. Best New Years, ever.
When ur pet falls asleep in ur lap and you have to choose between dying or waking them up
My cat does not care if you want to take your own virgin, porn bot, and she won't be meeting you. She's very busy.
Watson is spending #caturday
deploying Operation Lap Takeover. Please hold his calls.
When you let your mom cut your hair and she tells you what a handsome young man you are
Why lay on a padded sofa when a metal outdoor table is available?
When you and your friends take out half the Internet #squadgoals
The rest of that title is CHRISTMAS TREE. IT'S OCTOBER 21ST.
The search for the perfect Halloween costume is over.
Good thing I'm wearing a sweater.
East coast/west coast all before noon. Happy Friday to me.
Siri has so many dad jokes, I love it.