Payday the morra and I've just walked outta work with a 2k payrise. Am I dreaming? 😲👌💰
A swear Theresa May better keep her snoot nose out the pissing contest between Trump & NK. I'd like to remain alive. K thnx
Like the storyline was utter shit but the acting was on top 👌
It's like fucking lava
A fuckin wasp just crawled onto my ear and stung me. Absolute wee dick
How do you get 10 tonne of glitter out your hair. Asking for a friend
iPhone X.. Worth it? Considering ordering it
That vile pure fake accent on the TSB advert makes my blood pressure rise.
WHY FLO WHYYYYYY 😭#gbbo
& I loved it so much that I've went back and made it to S3 in 3 days 😂 can't wait to finish work tonight and marathon it again#mitchandcam
I watched all 188 episodes of Modern Family in under a week whilst working full time and continuing to not have a life 😂
Still woke up at the crack of dawn 🌙
Weekday off tomorrow. Thrilling.
"Lets get out of this rat fuck" is probably the best line uttered on a TV show ever.
It's strange how we love & cherish one of these animals, yet look at the other as a meat & dairy-producing machine. Both deserve compassion.
Getting tattooed in exchange for capri suns. Deal.
team time in work consists of us all sitting on our phones 😂😂😂 al take that
been emergency taxed 500 quid. Next months wage will be spectacular.
Took my bestie out for lunch to cheer her ass up and now a cant breathe I ate so much gulab jamun its coming out my pores
Forgot I stuck a tenner on Mayweather to win 9-11 & McGregor to be knocked down 7 & 8 at 80/1 . I know fuck all about boxing 😂
pure craaaazy cat lady its official.
What ye playing at McCoys?!?! Theres aboot 3 in that
My poor wee lamb 😭�bT
Sad that my wee kitten is getting her op tomorrow but will be worth it when its all done. Neuter your pets people.
a stand watching big ben dong for the final time. a single tear falls from my eye and onto my throbbing, erect cock. god save the queen
⚪️am afraid of confrontation
⚪️will discuss this rationally
🔘ain't fuckin scared of him
recently started Modern Family and holy fuck is it funny
Absolute beast of a telly got delivered today n I've just got in from work to find its too big for ma unit 😴😭👏 well done hen! ikea come @ me
fantastic work from @grinningsimp
tonight. And bravo BBC for highlighting such a big issue with such grace and unbias. #RefugeesWelcomeHere
If you were a bankcard where would you be hiding?
don't understand how some ppl can live in absolute filth with mess everywhere. Nothing feels better than a bit of order and a good hooverin
"No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin or his background or his religion..."
Omfgggggggh why is there 14 year olds getting engaged down clydeside :S
favouriting a girl giving a guy head has made my actual day. That not private pal?
I only have four moods
First backshift in forever n already struggling 😴😴😴😴 fling 3059492 earlies in a row at me.
Absolutely LOVING #Billions
. 2 episodes left to re-watch this evening then having to wait until next year for S3. Its a sin for me.
Which, in your opinion, is best?
Oh naw but thank you Or*nge Walk for ruining my only day for a long-lie in weeks. Bin them.
Pretending I know what a hedge fund is
I laughed out loud at this. Bin me 😂twitter.com/datassque/stat…
my hair has been getting washed nightly and fucked up into 2 buns for about 12 days now I'm afraid its stuck like that 😂
"why are you always skint"
because things like this exist.
could be a pal of a pals uncles ex wifes neighbour n they'll still change their dp to a photo of the 2 of them n kiddon they were bbfl
see when someone dies, why is there always someone who has to make it all about themselves?