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Paul Johnstone

#OlympicBoxing has Richie Woodall developed selective hearing regarding boxing scores?
Take a Daily Mirror poll you’ll find most of its readers Labour supporters Take a Telegraph poll, you’ll find most of your wires fall down
In Iran everyone’s scared of spiders, but in Iraq no phobia. #LunchFun
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate. #LunchFun
Ninety eight percent of cross-eyed teachers have difficulty controlling their pupils. #LunchFun
#FeministAMovie Back to the future I told you so!
Before he died my Dad worked a JCB. At his funeral his colleagues said that now he’s gone he’s left behind a hole that will never be filled.
If I owned a German car dealership in Texas I would definitely call it “Audi Partner”. #LunchFun
#Olympics Rugby 7s #EddieButler If a ball has been knocked on does it na=matter if it's a small one or a big one? No it's a knock on
Where do you find giant snails? On the ends of giant's fingers. #1pmLunch
Ed Ling in the mens trap I didn't gnow going to the toilet was an #Olympic event
Seven days without a pun makes one weak. #Punn
Old electricians never die, they just lose contact.
What's a cow eating grass? A lawn mooer. #LunchFun
#FlashBackFriday to the final show of our 10th season! We can't wait to see these smiling faces again in 2017!
Retweeted by Paul Johnstone
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. #LunchFun
How did I escape Iraq? Iran. #1pmLunch
#LunchFun To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing! #1pmlunch
To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing! #LunchFun
Did a gig at a conference for sufferers of extreme Acne. Told my first joke, the place erupted. #LunchFun
Two banks with different rates have a conflict of interest. #LunchFun
Who ever invented the “Knock-Knock jokes” should get a No-bell prize
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