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Miranda Barker

Well four hours later and @Delta has screwed us over. Never ever ever flying with them again.
Our flight for tonight was cancelled and rebooking has been a three hour process with @Delta. What a nightmare.
When I get tipsy I get really generous with my Instagram likes.
Marcia Clark was the feminist of the year in 1995.
Four years and two days ago a boy asked for my phone number at church, and I was so excited that I accidentally left my brother there.
Kick yourself out you're an immigrant too.
Everyone in Collin's family keeps saying "Soof-john Stevens." @sufjanstevens
Where was Olivia Pope when we needed her last night?
Working on homework past midnight. Someone please send Cheryl's cookies. 😔
Toby is definitely my favorite Office character.
It’s too bad that the only Republican candidates that make any sense are in like last place.
"Wanna listen to elevator music?" "This is JAZZ, Miranda."
My dad is my biggest Instagram fan. @MKRowenhorst
So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom. - Psalm 90:12 So that our days count.
Fleece-lined leggings changed this Minnesotan's life.
I just bought me and Collin matching underwear. I don’t think he’ll be as excited as I am. 😂
Oh my goodness this is how I eat them too!…
It's also unacceptable that guac is extra at Chipotle. Can you change that too?…
Collin said that his New Years Resolution is to get me a cat.
I literally had a Christmas cookie for breakfast and then I came back and had Cookie Crisp. #adulting
I have never been more unhappy with a movie ending then with Roman Holiday.
“It’s almost as if people with disabilities were the 20th century lepers.” Christians-- what does that tell you?
Exactly 2 3/4 years ago was the first time I saw my future husband. (minus like twenty minutes but whatever)
Three years ago today I broke up with an exboyfriend. I would never have guessed then that I would've already be married now for 6 months. 😂
Collin watches Scandal with me and gets so annoyed. He just says, "Ugh, my favorite character is Huck. I'm just team Huck." @guillermodiazyo
Don't compare tragedies & different oppressions. So ridiculous that #BlackLivesMatter is vs. #PrayForParis. This isn't a competition.
My children are going to grow up watching Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood.
I remember the day that it dawned on me that pipe-cleaners are pipe cleaners and not only arts & crafts supplies.
Well that was the Mondayest Monday I've experienced in awhile.
Stone Creek Coffee, you're awesome. I would move to Milwaukee just to be one of your regulars. |…
I talk in my sleep and freak my husband out.
Collin bribes me with watching Friends with me. Ex: "if you do dishes I'll watch Friends with you tonight." It works.
For some reason I am more of an emotional wreck today than I normally am.
I got my electric blanket out. Thanks Minnesota.
It looks like my Facebook friends are all having a photography contest of the supermoon.
Somebody please buy me a Zendaya Barbie Doll. I LOVE that Mattel has done this.
Someone take this bowl of Guac away from me. (I’m pretty sure I’ve tweeted this before. This just always happens when we have guac at home)
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