this is what your girlfriend thinks you sound like when you start talking crypto
The movie detective’s dead wife in a home video:
this is the best sports commentary ive ever heard
Older friend in college: Yo we should throw a function tonight. Serious
Stoner friend: Hell yeah dude. Ill bring the pot and bongs
Nerd: Ahhh maybe. Ive got a test tomorrow
Girl whos been fucking Caillou: Can Caillou come
Polyamorous people love board games because they combine their two favorite things: rules and wasting time
cannot emphasize enough that this is a real show and not some absurdist comedy sketch.
Can we not call space tourists astronauts? They don’t call me bus driver when I take public transit. They call me The Whistler and everyone hates me.
Brits call cinnamon buns Chelsea buns. That is all.
I doubt any of the folks who are upset about the redesign of Lola Bunny have ever even fucked a rabbit. Hypocrites.
They are trying so hard to connect with the audience that they hate
The Pope got hospitalized and announced support for healthcare for all.
So what I’m hearing is, now we just need to get the Pope pregnant.