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Zach Crocker
This has to be the greatest card combination I've ever played in #CardsAgainstHumanity.
A contestant on the upcoming season of Big Brother is the brother of Ariana Grande. That just isn't fair. I wanna watch REAL people. #BB16
It should be illegal to air the same commercial more than once during a TV show. #UnnecessarilyRepetitive
I just had a really bad day, and then my mom surprised me with this gem. Now #EverythingIsAwesome once again. #thelegomovie
Jammin' to some Fleetwood Mac up in here. #werk #twerk #werktotwerk
Guess who just got summoned for jury duty! 😑🚨😳
"New York State of Mind" is supposed to "inspire" us, yet there's a McDonald's behind Alicia Keys in nearly every shot in the music video.
If the CIA needs new ideas for interrogation programs, just have the detainees watch a television series created by ABC Family.
Power's out! No lights, no computers. Happy Friday the 13th y'all.
My favorite word in the dictionary is babushka with poppycock coming in at a very close 2nd.
.@Jeffy_Payne just told me the ending to The Fault in our Stars and now I can't stop laughing. #dead #offensivetweet
Don't follow me, I don't know where the hell I'm going!
Retweeted by Zach Crocker
Someone see Godzilla with me this week!
I love how this ratchet ho and Justin Bieber look-a-like get a happy ending on #Catfish, and the others who are well deserving don't.
Everybody's twerkin' for the weekend. Wait, what?
I just realized I had forgotten to take my allergy meds for several weeks, but I don't have any allergy symptoms. I've finally won the war.
I'm in love with the girl from the Wendy's commercials.
I just had a salad for lunch, and I think I'm more hungry than I originally was.
Does anyone else watch America's Got Talent solely for the outrageous auditions?