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"It was extremely painful bringing you into this world" Mum's trying to pursuade me to stop buying alc and buy her gifts instead
Came out of hospital feeling like I'd just starred in a Brazzers movie with the amount of abuse my mouth received
Brother turns the awkward age of 17 tomorrow, he can enjoy spending a year at home while his 18 year old friends all go on nights out :')
Publicly shaming myself by turning off protected tweets.
Next time you're grocery shopping, imagine David Attenborough narrating. It really next-levels the whole thing.
Apparently so good that they even made a Rape Zombie: Lust of the Dead 2, I love Japan.
Movietube has some classic horrors.. and then you come across stuff like this
But no, horror movie character gotta investigate that shit, even if it means getting a knife through the throat by Casper the friendly ghost
As soon as doors start slamming, you hear footsteps and see shadows, thats a clear sign to get the fuck out the house and nuke it from orbit
Which tbf is the norm for 95% of my pics
I look like a crack dealer getting a police mugshot.
My horrid attempt at a passport style photo somehow got approved for Glasto registration
Food & drinks at @1884wtb
tonight, can't wait 👌
don't worry pal, you'll still have the mentality of a 13 year old!
Lots and lots of chocolate + Sucker Punch
Yaaaas, found Kaiser Chiefs Employment album in my cupboard, indie rock day.
Glastonbury registration done, next year's looking promising 👌
Just as I think Hannibal can't possibly get anymore fucked up, they somehow manage to top it every week.
Can hear the faint sound of Arctic Monkeys coming from East Park and I have no idea why
Dad turned David Attenborough off to put Big Bang Theory on, can I move out now.
Tchami playing Leeds a day after Leeds Fest, awfully bloody tempting.
Brush fire going on in California is cray courtchatter.com/#!cbs-news-liv…
Bryce Dallas Howard in Jurassic World tho
Taken me an hour to eat a drumstick lolly, brace struggs
Feeling like a post Mountain Oberyn Martell
Feels like its been ages since I last went to Welly
"breeding beagles for vivisection" 🔫twitter.com/rickygervais/s…
Need some Doritos, Mtn Dew & several 360 no-scopes for the amount of dubstep I've listened to this morning.
Sat here enjoying myself and then BAM, blinded by the light of a thousand suns
Pure white loading screens, ultimate eye killers
It doesn't help that he didn't know mine or my brother's birthdays or my mum's birthday or how to spell my mum's full forename. Step it up.
Dad's getting pissy at how painful filling in the student finance forms are. Please dad, I need drink money to carry me through 3rd year.
Fox Hunting vote cancelled & Pluto news, today has started off perfect.
Nasa's New Horizons probe returns most detailed image of #Pluto
yet bbc.in/1HZEvIr #PlutoFlyby
10 days until I leave my teens behind and it becomes even more socially unacceptable for me to sit playing video games all day
An hour in and I think I've laughed once, Inbetweeners 2 should not have happened.
After a 9 month hiatus, new Berserk chapter gets released on my birthday, hype hype.
Hancock 2 looks INTENSE!!!! twitter.com/SuicideSquadWB…
Out of all the shows I want to watch I've decided to start with Supernatural. Next I'll be posting pics of Me x Winchesters on Tumblr.
Either due to being a complete failure or being too embarrassed to turn up with a third.
This time next year I'll either be there celebrating or sat with a bottle of vodka watching the graduation live stream from home.