Please upgrade your browser to make full use of twiends.   chrome   firefox   ie   safari  
Roaring 20s couple this Halloween with the kiwi!…
"Want anything from Chipotle?" "No, I don't want to poop weird." "You mean you don't want to ruin your Halloween costume?" #workquotes
"Tiger Woods doesn't have to direct HR, he just has to direct balls!" #workquotes
That Roxxy's life: grilled cheese with pulled pork and poutine truffle……
The Feed Me pumpkin has returned this year, along with @smiley_kiley23's……
Loving fall's perfect windows down driving weather. Ready for fun in the……
"Why are they asking me for a safe word? I'm just here for a dental cleaning..." #workquotes
"Okay, first thing, you don't go to Guadalajara if you are having butt problems." #workquotes
"The phrase 'Jewish goodbye' sounds strangely ominous" #workquotes
Relive Ultra 2015 is out! Can't wait for Ultra 2016!… #umf #ultra
"Loop the flute, is that what the kids are calling it these days?" #workquotes
On the subject of heat waves in Baltimore: "You start getting grumpy and then you pop a cap in somebody!" #looptheflute #workquotes
The cruelty of life is that it can only be understood backwards, but must be lived forwards.
Retweeted by Vertice
"I need a HoHo. Officer, when I said I was looking for Little Debbie, I meant something else!" #workquotes
"Blacksmith lives matter too!" #workquotes
So addicted. Hands down the best food choice on Wednesdays and Thursdays at work <3
My new sounds: Limitless by Adventure Club… on #SoundCloud
No better way to celebrate one amazing year with my kiwi! Very lucky to……
On the subject of age differences in dating: "Hey, we're data people! Half your age + 7!" #workquotes
Shot of the newly Plasti dipped rims in the day time, very happy with how……
Ancient infosec penetration-testing trick: Drop a thumb drive labeled "exec salaries" in the elevator. #TIL via @kaspersky's Chris Doggett
Retweeted by Vertice
Finally dipped my rims matte black! 💯…c
MTC memorial for those who no longer work here (no they didn't die!).……
Movie time with the cat and the kiwi ❤️…
"I'm gonna get a bunch of stickers made: More Bush 2016." #morebush2016 #workquotes
"We can solve all of the world's problems if we are all just a little less compassionate." XD #workquotes
"What flavor is blue raspberry?" "Its the same principle as blue balls, it's a raspberry pent up with flavor!" #workquotes
At Graycliff in Nassau, the third largest private wine collection in the world, with @smiley_kiley23!
"GoPro and Fitbit combined = GoFit" "GoFit yourself!" XD @1rosebyanyother
"great minds think cookie" "alike" "I said alike alright?" - @smiley_kiley23 #girlfriendquotes
On the subject of a certain startup in Boston: "Dude has a theology degree, so he's used to praying for good luck." #workquotes
"I like a well rounded pope..." "So you want a fat pope?" "That's santa claus!" #workquotes
4th of July with the kiwi and friends in Salem! ❤
"Javier now has a localized salamonella infection..." "I told him he should stop making those chicken milkshakes!" #workquotes
A worker was killed by a robot at a #VW plant in Germany #Skynet #Terminator
Retweeted by Vertice
Something to crown the new apartment and to save for our upcoming 1 year anniversary! #aceofspades
"You're from Arkansas, we'll call you cornbread." "All things considered, that's a pretty tame nickname for someone from there." #workquotes
Best response to recruiters: "Thanks for reaching out, please remove me from this mailing list." #workquotes
"Donald Trump is like the real life Scrooge McDuck." #workquotes
"Jeb Bush supports common core education..." "Yeah, but have you seen his new logo? It's sexy!" #workquotes
"I was an awesome pre-school teacher until a child vomited on me and I threw them off of me." #workquotes

Twitter Sign-in
We are going to send you to Twitter to authorize twiends.
Please note that we never tweet or follow people without your permission.