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prison mike
when people have "I probably hate you" in their bio
Retweeted by prison mike
can i wear a sign on my forehead at work that says "i don't give a fuck about your kid"
i think apple bread pudding is my new favorite food
"hitler was just misunderstood"
the homeless people in Madison have no chill
who's stars who is stars answer me
Retweeted by prison mike
me: goodnight moon :) moon: night<3 me: goodnight stars :) moon: wtf me: sry wrongnumber moon: whos stars moon: who is stars moon: answer me
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i wish it was possible for me to take an afternoon nap without waking up feeling like absolute death
When they say "either change your attitude or leave"
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i'm feeling this look
some positivity on your feed this morning! hope everyone has a great weekend 🌻
happy first day of halloween
I'm so cold I want to curl up in my warm bed and then maybe die
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i hate when people try super hard to be yourself yo people will probably think you're just as cool
Mars: Come over NASA: You're 33.9 million miles away Mars: I'm wet NASA: I'm coming over
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it feels SO GOOD when you see or hear someone's name that fucked you up emotionally and you don't feel anything
you can edit instagram captions now?! how long have i not known about this
can I become twitter famous by retweeting cat videos all day
why I need to buy a garbage can with a lid.
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i feel cute today! (i took the second picture on accident but it turned out cute)
I was looking at tweets & saw that i really hurt someones feelings ! Im sorry. It was light blue background with white egg shape . Bye
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went over to my boyfriends to watch the walking dead, he's been talking to his friends for the past hour about video game theory. nice
things that don't end well: 1. everything
Retweeted by prison mike
why the fuck are my neighbors turning up on a god damn tuesday in the middle of mid term week
proof that no matter how much you demean yourself for men they will still put you down
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theres more to this story & it would take like a year 2 explain but basically don't go after guys in serious relationships bc u look dumb AF
anyway...i found the cutest rebecca minkoff phone case who has $40 to help a girl out
i should probably protect my tweets because i tweet about personal shit sometimes but honestly i dont care enough
i'm just laughing because the dumb bitch probably realized she didn't have a snowballs chance in hell w him & is bitter about it
and said she was super bitchy and awkward towards him and he realized they were never rly friends
this girl my bf used to be kinda friends w & who had a creepy thing for him, well he saw her today
They replaced Fergie??? RT @chocoiatetwink: black eyed peas w rice ❤️❤️❤️
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*holds it together on the streets, has an existential crisis in the sheets*
Retweeted by prison mike
I thought she rlly was a sock monkey😰😤this y u cant trust females these day😰💯👌🏾👏🏾 take her💯swimming💯for a 1sco/GMWRVuUeVO
Retweeted by prison mike
Ben wyatt crying in a batman suit
Retweeted by prison mike

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