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michael scarn
comedy twitter 1,970 followers
out in the madtown burbs
What is so hard about committing yourself to one person?
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“holy shit this girl is so hot my boner is mt rushmore” “you have 4 heads?”
google maps is such a lifesaver
everyone’s right, once you move out your relationship w your parents becomes 10000x better
having my first cup of coffee since moving… im starting to feel human again
sometimes i think about all of the people that dont follow me but probably look at my social media & i feel uncomfortable
“Lust is Saturday night; love is Sunday morning.”
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No matter how difficult it looks, no matter how impossible the challenge seems, if you believe you have God on your side, that’s nice.
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is it really safe to cook & text at the same time pic.twitter.com/UKVQV7zfRZ
my pictures on IG have been getting a lot of attention lately & i dont know why
every couple has their issues but i dont understand people that break up every other day like damn
what is the ice bucket challenge and why is everyone talking about it!!!!
you know youre hella hungry when ramen noodles taste amazing
you cant stop the waves but you can learn how to surf
how do males find it hilarious that they make girls uncomfortable and literally afraid to go outside???
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ok Jason z hury up and get the dirt off youre shoulder your friend the worm need it to live sheesh
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do all things with kindness
tired af from running around walmart for an hour but we finally have food