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Tom Nash
Shola Ameobi? No thank you.
Turns out there's a sign about it but some kind citizen has smashed off the important part. Helpful.
Chucking a ball about for the dog right in the middle of the airfield. Slowly dawns on me that *everyone else* is circling the edge. Fear.
#FoodUnwrapped should be 5 minutes long and just someone googling the answers to their stupid questions. It's a £100 fix for a £5 problem.
Who's the target audience for #FoodUnwrapped? Three year olds? Not sure I've heard a more patronising narration.
Pro #SnoopersCharter peer: "I don’t know what Whatsapp or Twitter are, but the terrorists do." So much wrong in one simple sentence.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
My jeans shrunk in the wash and are now a bit tight. I also now understand why many young men are so angry.
You'd think gate opening ability would be brought up early, like during application or interviewing or something...
Loosened the babygate so Ooof the fairy elephant @RoyalMail postman wouldn't break it again and the mouthbreathing supercock still managed.
Go Greece! Greece shows us there is another way. When the economy is broken, we don't have to blame its victims but those who broke it.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Elected government vows to represent its own people's interests rather than those of the bankers, multinationals & super rich: causes crisis
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Reminder: Never trust any story based on an MP's own survey. The questions tend to be a BIT loaded: pic.twitter.com/3tpjl2EUMv (via @bristling)
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Aaaaaaaand done. Thanks for your patience.
In the process of overloading your timeline with cartoons (loosest meaning of the word) I did this week over at @tutandgroan.
Proper cartoonists what can draw are sharing and favouriting @tutandgroan toons. 👍
Debut album COLD WINTER by Sheisty Khrist x Lofidel NOW AVAILABLE. ---> coldwinter.bandcamp.com pic.twitter.com/dljwD5dl80
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Do you use @StumbleUpon? We've chucked everything on there for easy stumbling. Go on, gis a thumbs up. Go on. stumbleupon.com/stumbler/tutan…
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Proper windy on the old airfield but we don't mind... pupdate
Fuck knows why Chamakh is mocked by most football fans. He's better than most of your players.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Please keep an eye out for elderly neighbours in the cold spell. It's hilarious when they fall over.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Bloke on this podcast keeps pronouncing subconscious 'subconscience' and now I can't help but wish him serious bodily harm.
Ok, I genuinely wasn't fussed about how many followers I had, but @JimTheSG is holding my Dreamcast to ransom until I reach 300. Please RT
Retweeted by Tom Nash
What better place to pluck your chin hairs than the corner of a busy road...? Missed the photo op. Annoyed now.
Two old fellas outside the Asda chatting, say 'bye' and 'have a good day'. Both walk off in the same direction in silence. Cringe.
Laptop can't burn @sheistykhrist Cold Winter to disc fast enough.
The Sun are doing exactly what newspapers always do- reflect their readership. And their readers are pricks. They'll think it's dead clevva.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Rodrigo will haunt my nightmares for a long time. Shiny people are scary. #bodyshockers
This lady's fiance hasn't seen her head in five years together but the nation gets a good look. Ah, the power of free private surgery...
I'm angry now because I know these people exist. #bodyshockers
Beard transplants. Beard. Transplants. Ugh.
I've never wanted to shave my beard off more. What a bunch of cunts #bodyshockers
I'm just a boy, standing in front of a girl, standing behind Uncle Jim, asking her why he's started a Conga at a funeral, of all places.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
Why have people suddenly started putting .@ in the middle of tweets? THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS.
Retweeted by Tom Nash
I make gag cartoons as @tutandgroan, like this one (shut up, it is clever) tutandgroan.wordpress.com Gis a click, eh? pic.twitter.com/A6Fn4wUvie