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brock murley
comedy podcast podcasts 7,560 followers
I'm not allowed to fly for 4 weeks. Being ill has totally fucked up my jet-setting lifestyle.
BREAKING NEWS: Chinese aircrew fail to find #MH370, but have found a lot of odd socks.
Thursday! We've got a bumper comedy festival lineup of SECRET GUESTS! 68 Hardware Lane, City. 8.30pm, $12!
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Do I have any mechanics in Melbourne following me?
Please come to my #MICF show so I can stop spending my nights doing this. Thanks! #RosebudMICF
Retweeted by brock murley
Doctor said I'm not allowed to blow up any balloons. There goes my plans for a party planning business. :(
Air in my chest and in my neck. So sexy.
Another day. Another 4 hours in hospital
I've been summoned back to hospital.
Why must I be unwell when I've finally got things to do? Curse you make believe being in the sky!
Worst thing about today was spending 4 hours in a hospital bed. Best thing about today was being looked after by sweet and sexy nurses.
Today I had a near death experience. I was standing next to Keith Richards.
Four hours later and I'm headed home.
I'm at JB Hi-Fi (Doncaster, VIC)
Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work we go!
Does anyone have any idea how much a RWC costs if the car has no issues?
No bus service from work to home when I knocked off. CRAP! Give me car finance car selling people.
Turns out ctrl alt delete doesn't work on tattoos... whoops.
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Termites? RT @Pandafactor: Sheesh. They're all coming out of the woodwork aren't they? Eff off.
Since I started typing this tweet Bernard Tomic has lost 4 more tennis matches. #tennis
Bernard Tomic’s name is longer than his last match. #tennis