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Tweet Like A Girl

731,885 followers
Me: He's playing games just drop him Inner me: so lets play a game
annoyin when u know u should be savin money for things u actually need but u just cant stop urself from spendin money on absolute shit 24/7
Oh you don't have a valentine on valentine's day? Some people don't even have a groundhog on groundhogs day. check your privilege
doctor: are you sexually active me: i'm not even physically active
why does this mannequin look like he's waiting for his class to shut up
when you tell your siblings u bout to hop in the shower and the next thing you hear is the bathroom door shut and w… twitter.com/i/web/status/8…
When I arrive at a party and tell myself to take things slow VS me 20 minutes later
me when I fuck up real bad
*hears & sees what drunk me did* "that wasn't me that was patricia"
when u accidentally step on your dogs paw
I just finished it!! I'm praying for a season 2 😭😭 I fuckin loved Santa clarita diettwitter.com/awihuna/status…I5
cute things to call your girlfriend: 1. sugar 2. honey 3. flour 4. egg 5. 1/2 lb butter 6. stir 7. pour into pan 8. preheat to 375°
Mom: "DON'T ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME!" Me:
if i text back in under 2-5 mins just know i wanna talk to u
guys will give you a reason to act "crazy" then complain and say you're "crazy"
System of a Down: "WAKE UP!" Me: GRABABRUSHANDPUTALITTLE MAKE UP! pic.twitter.com/skM7Ffv8H9
when your message goes from read back to delivered
These graphs accurately represent my life thus far
I hate when ppl take advantage of others& treating them like shit just bc they know they have a genuine weak spot for them& that’s fucked up
*hears & sees what drunk me did* "that wasn't me that was patricia"
I'm such a needy person I need love and affection all the time
I wish my butt was as big as my attitude
me: wtf i know im gonna ace this test test paper: Name: me: pic.twitter.com/6EePK8aUev
do you me know who is beautiful? read the third word (:
when the beef is in quote tweets
Boyyyyy this went from 0 to 60
when you see your food coming in a restaurant
they are so cute 😭�IU
Most fire lemonade to exist 🔥C
Me: I really gotta save money.. "Let's go out tonight" Me:
I notice the SLIGHTEST vibe that's off, it doesn't matter if it's thru text, over the phone or we exchanged like 3 words. I can always tell
If someone did this for me I'd die, I love gushers 😭�2k
Me: i have so much homework ugh Also me:
This is amazing 😍�4N
you can't spell disappointment without men
Do you want to see a magic trick?
HOW CAN YALL SAY PINEAPPLE DONT GO ON PIZZA CUZ ITS A FRUIT? WHATS TOMATO THEN? SHUT! UP!
I hope ur day is as nice as my ass
Valentine's Day coming up, options are limited
I took Valentines Day VERY seriously in elementary school. I was like, "She's getting the small Hannah Montana sticker cuz i dont like her"
y'all lucky joan rivers is dead
When you accidentally double tap someone's picture from 57 weeks ago
LOOK AT RIH ON FACETIME
Adele won Album Of The Year and was crying saying Lemonade deserved it, wow I love her
"I think we need to see other people" me:
 
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