As long as you learn from your mistakes it's fine, because learning this way is the best form of tuition.
People are jealous of everything these days, why don't you just stop hating/wanting and value the things you've got in your own life.
I purchased a microwave bed recently, hoping to get 8 hours in 10 mins,
My favourite part of the day is my favourite part.
"You look like your dad"
That's amazing because having his genetics I didn't think I would, I thought I would look like a potato.
I wish I had a mute button for people, or even better just ctrl-alt-delete them.
you can't insult me, because i don't value the words that come out of your mouth.
have you seen the latest from @frankieboyle
lol, what a guy.
That awkward moment your Facebook friends with someone you don't like.
I actually can't wait for Christmas 😬🎅🎅🎄🎄
Everybody loves boobs.
People hate it when you're different, they just want you be the same as everybody else.
a blunt pointy thing.
Sticky toffee pudding or carrot cake?
R.i.p to the soldiers that gave there lives to the well being of our country.
My spelling and grammar has improved a lot since I joined twitter.
Partly due to the fact of grammar trolls.
People will always judge you no matter what, so just do what you want anyway.
Everyone's out partying and I'm just like... pic.twitter.com/DC32A1Iz7y
I couldn't of said it better myself Robin. pic.twitter.com/HmWQQf2jv3
Rt if you can't dance.
Flip phones, lol
I think Facebook should change the "new stories" button to,
"Same old stories"
I honestly clicked on the Michael Bolton trend because I thought he had died, my apologies mike.
Bestfriends has 11 letters,
but so does backstabber.
Can't sleep? Here's what you should do > bit.ly/HygCK3
i didn't want salmon!! i said it 4 times
the best answer to a dumb question is a sarcastic one.
Thrush Hour 2 #smellyfilms
the great pasty
If you've never jumped from one couch to the other to save yourself from crocodile infested waters then you didn't have a childhood
"you're always on your phone"
and you're always stuck in 1974
Before sex, you help each other get naked.
After sex, you only dress yourself.
Moral of the story:
No one helps you once you're f**ked.
An "ex" is called an "ex" because its and "ex"ample of who you shouldn't date in the future.
Parents notice your fake friends before you do.
Why do people cry on the last day of school? You should be crying on the first day of school.
That annoying moment when people only respond to the last part of your text, and leave the first and middle parts unanswered.
i would like to thank my legs for always supporting me
BUT DAD I WANT THESE SHOES,