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oral b the paste god
when your friends stay posting about their live ass group chat so the only left to do is subtweet them
Secretary of state: I haven't had that much vodka since college Claire: Tulane, right? Secretary: so they tell me it's all kind of a blur
Forget the dress guys..... What color am I?
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Remember when Kylie Jenner dyed her hair white and gold? pic.twitter.com/TNltIGd8iG
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.@taylorswift13 been obsessed with you since I was 11 but now you're pulling this black and blue shit. I feel betrayed but still obsessed.
SOS professor didn't move the cursor off the screen before playing the movie pic.twitter.com/glBVpFbsZX
smells like paint and it's not even formal season
to the gross boys making our future house smell like a cab drivers ass hole, stop. thanks.
American sniper just won an Oscar let me drink from my cup of liberal tears
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πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
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This just in Lady Gaga is an angel More at 11
Common needs to narrate my life
John Legend could sing the Taco Bell menu and it would still be the most beautiful thing you've ever heard.
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Someone save Naomi watts from the alien on stage with her
We understand you've got places to be, @Drake.
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Sorry professor I can't come to class my hair straightener broke
Still haven't forgiven B.O.B. or Hayley Williams for Airplanes. I don't think I ever will tbh
Wearing a firefighters uniform just in case someone hands me the aux cord
β€œ@voxdotcom: More than half of America's wealth is inside this circle bit.ly/1yTH1Fp pic.twitter.com/JRresgOWMl” represent DMV
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"Oh my god Maddy you're obsessed with dogs" Are you not? Wtf is wrong with you??
( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)
Also I see people commenting on Tyga and Kylie but they were thotting it up on Georgia Ave w 21 year olds in high school πŸΈβ˜•οΈ
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Yes 911? Jimmy johns is late
PSA jimmy johns is open today #blessed
It’s Mardi Gras! I’m celebrating the way I always do, just instead of New Orleans, I’m in Burbank. And instead of beads, I got a citation.
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Amber Rose is gross to look at
hey there delilah what's it like up in those titties
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Mardi Gras is a cruel person that takes everything you have including your adderall
I'd like to tahnk everyone in advance for attending my funderal this morning
All I want is Panda Express but it's 7:30am
Even though I just shotgunned a beer I feel as if this is the most sober I've been since thursday
The "white girl during mardi gras" starter pack πŸ™ŒπŸ˜‚pic.twitter.com/2yJQUZwV7PV7P
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All I want is Panda Express but it's 7:30am
.@kanyewest should be considered an artist like da vinci
For every retweet this gets, Pedigree will donate one bowl of dog food to dogs in need! 😊#tweetforbowlsspic.twitter.com/g9YIggA8oKK
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β€œ@svintmvrtin: Me trying to seduce bae vine.co/v/OTwUBuOnaUK” @KingMarcusXIII IS THE "do it for the vine" GIRL THAT FARTED?!?!
🎡on the first day of Mardi Gras New Orleans gave to me... Nowhere for me to fuckin pee🎡
My old ass driver keep farting 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑!!!!!!!
Retweeted by oral b the paste god