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Steve Martin

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Goodnight to all of my Twitter followers, and don't forget to check out my latest...uh...thing.
  9h
It was heathen, and I decided to let it be. @MElfenbaum Did you save the t-shirt you wore in "A Streetcar Named Desire?"
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Thank you.The movie was originally called "The Oboe." I was duped.@GregularBasis It was brave portraying the oboe in The Piano.
  9h
Thank you. That is one of the best movies I haven't been in. @SusanRedmond The Big Lebowski is one of the best movies I have ever seen.
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I lost that battle when cat went splat. @sargent_bosco Are you still active in the fight against cat juggling?
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I think you mean my Camero. @ItinerantMonk Loved your cameo in Ghostbusters.
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You are wrong, but just generally. @KevHegarty23 Correct me if wrong, but weren't you Excalibur in The Sword in the Stone?
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Auditioned. Didn't get it. @regibaby67 @teleskiguy Didn't you also play Bill Murray's two holed bowling ball in Kingpin?
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Nobody seems to notice it was a "two hole" performance.@teleskiguy Really enjoyed your poignant cameo as a bowling ball in "Big Lebowski."
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No, but it certainly set me back.@CheetahPizzas Were you ever arrested on Sun Valley Miniature Golf Course with a wig on your penis?
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I don't "do" banjo lessons; I "take" banjo lessons. @SirAlexoftheRae do you do banjo lessions?
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I played wagon wheel number 4 in chariot race. @booksnshoes were you in Ben Hur? I can't remember.
  9h
Early work as left molar. @agingbuffoon I think your appearance in Cannibal Holocaust was your best work.
Thanks for leaving out the comma. @holyjunkbuckets Whatever happened to your dog Shithead?
Overlooked as left molar. @SniperMaverick You were snubbed for Jaws.
Actually done by a stand-in. I had a cold that day. @Ambergoose7 Enjoyed your recent cameo as the flashing green light in Gatsby.
Last Tango tough because of sex scenes with myself. Rise of King Tut on music charts helped.@paparennie I loved you in Last Tango in Paris
I felt my role as "the Man" was underrated.@krycek12 @SHQtallahassee You were overlooked in Midnight Express!
It was an honor not to have been nominated. @SHQtallahassee I loved you not being in The Avengers.
There were 4 mules used in shooting the film. Me, Walken, Pacino, De niro. @RickElliott2 Remind me - were you 'Mule 1' or Mule 2?
I made "2001" a great film.@hemo_jr Some actors are so good that by simply not being in a movie, it gets pushed to the next level.
I actually preferred me in "Two Mules for Sister Sara."@duke9555 You were superb in The Bad News Bears
I was great in the Parent Trap! Oh, wait, that was some other movie. @bethanyeexx I'm watching the parent trap haha woo
Wow, the ladies must like you! RT @CanisSapien80: Whenever I wear a hat I'm described as "Trying to hard."
Why is it whenever I wear a hat, I'm described as "in disguise?" nytimes.com/2013/05/16/fas…
Yet, we miss you here in NYC. RT @RichardEGrant: It's as humid as a hippo's armpit and sauna soothingly lush!
I'm quoted on this, but it's really from, "Bilko."RT @msund1: "All I've ever wanted is an honest weeks pay for an honest days work."
With my friend the artist Eric Fischl at the launch of his great memoir, "Bad Boy." pic.twitter.com/A31YuDyCMi
Spent an afternoon with the President of the United States. That's right. I am now 24,434,432 in the in line of succession.
Rounder records has posted our (@ediebrickell) new album in full on YouTube. youtube.com/watch?v=0aAy6Y…
Hi. I am the Internet. I now own Steve's Twitter feed. I like Rice-a-Roni ads but cat videos not so much.
I love the Internet! I'm giving it my Social Security number.
Ha ha ha! The Internet is so funny.
The Internet and I are having a drink and talking about it.
I haven't tweeted for a while because I'm mad at the Internet.
I suppose next you'll be telling me that Cleveland is not a country. @mrianbillings Abu Dhabi isn't a nation....
Same song. We got confused. RT @cheezmo:What is the name of track 11? I see "Who Are You Gonna Wake Up?" or "Who You Gonna Take?"
I guess I meant the painter. RT @G_Jai_: Are you sure that you are not talking about Liechtenstein?
Here's a link to me on the #Fallon show that the nation is talking about. Not this nation, but I think Lichtenstein.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjeffers…
Must have just happened between the typing and the tweeting. @EuskadiM I must point out that Abu Dhabi is not actually a nation.
Here's a link to me on the #Fallon show that the nation is talking about. Not this nation, but I think Abu Dhabi. mediamaxonline.com/dailybuzz/play…
That is a request up with which it is hard to put. *Churchill*RT @jwwashburn: Steve, do not end a sentence with a preposition.
What a fun night tonight on @jimmyfallon, with @ediebrickell, @jennafischer, @theroots. Not your mother's banjo.
Appearing on @jimmyfallon with @ediebrickell tonight. Will be televised, a forthcoming movie, and a book.
Oh my God, look who I met this morning! pic.twitter.com/3MjYMhljcf
“Love Has Come for You” as highest debut #21 on Billboard charts. Thanks for your support of CD we are proud of. bit.ly/ZKyVEc
A horse has won the Kentucky Derby!
It was like Guantanamo.@kmgunder @petersagal Still feel bad they made you sit on that horrible stool w nothing in front of you.
Just enjoyed doing @waitwait. So refreshing to prepare NOTHING.
At "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me," I was able to take this stunning, award winning, photo with @petersagal pic.twitter.com/taGz3ipBkc