Okay. I give up. I'm in the market for a man purse.
Was enjoying watching the game, then realized it was a sit-com.
I, just, found, a, whole, bunch, of, commas.
I have some extra commas and I'd like to give them away to those less fortunate: ,,,,,,,,,,,,
Whatever your religion, I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas.
Football players are such weenies. I'm injured all the time while writing, yet I continue.
"The tight pants blue and whites." MT @GarretLebois
They should be required to dress as aptly named.
I'm watching "Cowboys"play "Bears," yet, they are not dressed as such.
Forgive me if I say that "Love Has Come for You" also nominated for Americana Grammy for best song. amazon.com/Love-Has-Come-…
Wardrobe malfunction at halftime! My robe came open.
The halftime show is a chess game.
Is the game I'm watching the Super Bowl?
I wish I could send out the same tweet twice.
Downer. RT @BSingh_tronno
Hey Howard! Grammy Nom for @ediebrickell
and me! Best Americana Album. @HowardStern
Whoa! Grammy nomination for @ediebrickell
and me for Love Has Come for You! Best Americana Album.
Congrats re American Songwriter's Best 50 Albums 2013. Well deserved; great record. @ediebrickell
+ you = music bliss.
What a nice thing to say. RT @JoyceCarolOates
: Romantic fireside dinner on cold damp December night & "Love Has Come For You"--
You have to love the Mandela life.
Felonius Kundera? Of course! RT @HereLiesKarenin
: You know Kundera?
When the is custom to divulge another's private life, the highest stake is the disappearance of the individual.
Sometimes the New York Times doesn't put front page news anywhere in the newspaper. broadway.com/buzz/173386/st…
Amazon drone trying to pretend it's my hat to enter posh party. I'm okay with that.
I had just pressed "order," WHAP!
An Amazon drone just landed in my mouth.
I'm getting a lot of credit for an ironic Direct Message that went public.RT @SteveMartinToGo
: I don't get it. I really really don't get it.
I don't get it. I really really don't get it.
Old profile pic defeated! New, kinder profile pic installed! I'm sure this one can be trusted!
How do you work this thing.
Hi. I'm Steve's profile pic.
My foot is up by my ear now.
Angry profile pic beating me about the head and neck.
My profile pic just said, "let's take a walk outside."
The profile pic is begging me not to take it down.
I will be changing my profile pic soon to reflect that I am now a bit older.
Plane landing; losing connection. Adios!
I know. I'm a nut! RT @DoctorZom
It's never too late to arrive early on the planet Zorn.
I tried, but he wouldn't use it. MT @AnonymousNLouKY
that's what they make hand sanitizer for.
The now annual showing of Planes, Trains and Automobiles seems to bring out the tweets in you. John Candy was a gem.
Breaking News: Iran starting to enrich with Purell.
I hope my elbow bump with Pres. Obama does not cause international incident and hinder Iran talks.
I did not want to pass along my cold. RT @MagicZoetrope
: . elbow bumps @BarackObama
Working with Jim Parsons today and we are about to meet Obama. Hoping to become a federal judge! pic.twitter.com/Xv8Bq7cqpT
Don't forget to buy a CD player, too.
Don't cast laurel wreaths upon the messenger. Amazon's having 4 hour sale on my CD with Edie Brickell: amazon.com/dp/B00B9LN8HG/…
Dang. I'm here now, waiting. RT @EricIdle
: As usual The Daily Mail resorts to fiction. We have no plans to play The Hollywood Bowl.