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Stephen Colbert
comedian comedy television news 6,731,725 followers
TONIGHT: @beck performs songs from his new album, "Morning Phase." @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
  2h
If you watch one show that isn't The Report, make it a rerun of the Report. After that, check out Going Deep. on.natgeo.com/1qa3FX9
  4h
Last night's show, my best yet. on.cc.com/1jZcWTZ
Happy First Annual Tequila Day! I assume it's the first because I can't remember it happening last year for some reason.
TONIGHT: The CEO of SpaceX and Tesla Motors, @elonmusk. @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
Last night's show, my best yet. on.cc.com/1tFkD28
TONIGHT: @marymazzio and Oscar Vazquez from the new documentary, "Underwater Dreams." @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
Last night's show, my best yet. on.cc.com/1rsvixv
The Colbert Bump becomes the Lepucki Lift! Get "Sweetness #9" by Stephan Eirik Clark! #CutDownTheAmazon powells.com/cgi-bin/biblio…
Great news!!!!! My good friend P.K. Winsome just sold me an extra hundred characters for this tweet for the extremely low, low price of only
TONIGHT: Russian-American Journalist and Senior Editor at The New Republic, @juliaioffe. @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
Can't believe it's already Stage 16 of this year's Tour de France and there still hasn't been a single goal scored.
Last night's show, my best yet. on.cc.com/1nx04Fo
It's @NancyPelosi's second appearance on my show in 8 years. At this rate she's never going to get that free sub.
TONIGHT: House Minority Leader, @NancyPelosi. @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
Check out 2776, a star-packed album benefiting OneKid OneWorld. I hope it's a charity & not just a very selfish child 2776.us
Scientists engineered a worm that can't get drunk. Sorry, tequila, you lose this round!
Last night's show, my best yet. on.cc.com/1jEx2CN
Are animals intelligent? Sure! I let my monkey type my tweets and he does a great (PLEASE HELP ME ESCAPE) job!
Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.* *Foreigners need not apply.
I saved @ConanOBrien's Masturbating Bear! Now to celebrate with my trademark string dance!
Jon Stewart challenging me to a Star Wars Trivia contest? That's like bringing a Serraknife to a Slugthrower fight! bit.ly/1qiRX1b
TONIGHT: Animal rights lawyer Steven Wise fights for legal personhood for chimps. @ComedyCentral. 11:30/10:30c.
The KKK in South Carolina handed out candy to recruit new members. I'm guessing white chocolate.