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Starla.
yeah my boyfriends pretty cool but he's not as cool as me
Retweeted by Starla.
should I just start coloring my hair with semi permanent colors so I can do different colors like pink
BATHROOM BREAK. and scotch. BUT MOSTLY BATHROOM.
Retweeted by Starla.
First date: [Okay, don't let her know that you're the waiter] Her: tell me a little bit about yourself Me: is pepsi okay?
Retweeted by Starla.
what base is it when he cleans your cats' litter boxes
Retweeted by Starla.
my sass can go from 0-100 real quick
Retweeted by Starla.
Search History: Cat armor Buy armor for cats Cat jousting tournaments How to stop armored cats Cat army how to stop national guard phone #
Retweeted by Starla.
can we talk about what I just ordered pic.twitter.com/VyHNVTEFVK
(360): The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Retweeted by Starla.
may my butt get fatter, and my stomach get flatter amen
Retweeted by Starla.
People like this shouldn't be allowed anywhere near animals pic.twitter.com/seW5f6qMP7
Retweeted by Starla.
sorry for rear ending you, I was talking to the dog in the car next to me
Retweeted by Starla.
You're making two boxes of mac and cheese? "Yeah I'm having a real stressful day you know."
Retweeted by Starla.
(731): I promise that I won’t shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Retweeted by Starla.
Lie alone, it's all you can do now.
Retweeted by Starla.
When you're about to fall asleep for a nap and your baby wakes up.... 😒
Retweeted by Starla.
instead of saying hello when answering the phone, I always scream WHO DARES DISTURB THE DONUT WITCH
Retweeted by Starla.
we're way too happy this morning; obviously we're up to something pic.twitter.com/Y02nXfa0E2
I don't know how to take pictures of myself anymore
Retweeted by Starla.
prepare for an aching the rest of your liiiiiiife
Retweeted by Starla.
Sometimes I wonder what Chris Pratt is doing right at this very moment
Retweeted by Starla.
when u wanna subtweet but ur working on ur attitude pic.twitter.com/3OCXCd5Gzu
Retweeted by Starla.
Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries
Retweeted by Starla.
I can't decide if I need a hug, 6 shots or 3 months of sleep
Retweeted by Starla.
"Hey I know you're in tears over how much you hate your body right now, but can you just like put clothes on and take one for the team"
the cool thing about cats is they don't judge you when you're eating last night's leftovers out of the garbage
Retweeted by Starla.
"Sometimes your worst self is your best self"
Retweeted by Starla.
if you love someone, you should tell them everyday. i promise you it doesn't get old.
Retweeted by Starla.
Ron Swanson when he had 94 meetings in one day
Retweeted by Starla.
u ever listen to a song 12 times in a row and hope no one hears u
Retweeted by Starla.