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|Turtle Urtle|
musicdance 405 followers
I like poetry, long walks on the beach and poking dead things with a stick!
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life
Birds do it, bees do it, even educated fleas do it. Let's do it. Let's live in a homeless man's beard.
At the store a little kid in front of me farted really loudly. The mom said, ‘What do you say?’ and he’s like ‘THAANK YOUUUU.'
I went into a store to replace my old phone, I looked at the sales person held out my banana and told them I want to upgrade to an apple.
Shakespeare: "To be or not to be." Satre: "To do is to be." Socrates: "To be is to do." Scooby Doo: "Do be do be do."
why do adults say "you shouldve peed before you left/class started" like i cant just summon my pee whenever i want like "o pee come forth"
I prefer not to think before I speak. I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.
Don't you just love going to the Zoo and seeing Lions doing the frickle frackel in public! 😂
I went to the Zoo today, I saw some pretty cute animals. Turns out I wasn't the only one having fun today. Lions like to get it on in public
let's be honest, eyebrow gaps are more important than thigh gaps
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i sing along to blank space far too aggressively for someone who has a nonexistent list of ex-lovers
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why do adults say "you shouldve peed before you left/class started" like i cant just summon my pee whenever i want like "o pee come forth"
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I'm now an E-List celebrity in Kim Kardashian: Hollywood. You can be famous too by playing on iPhone! itunes.apple.com/app/id860822992
I had the best time of my life last night. #MONUMENTOUR thanks @PatrickStump @petewentz @JoeTrohmann @yelyahwilliams I willNEVER Forget It!
Get Keek! Download the app then follow me: _sydney_superhero_ keek.com/app
Get Keek! Download the app then follow me: _turtleurtle_ keek.com/app
SUGAR, WERE GOIN DOWN IS ONE OF THE BEST SONGS EVER OKAY NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE
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@miaalouisaaa lol Pete always makes that face
I'm at home. Bored. I have nothing to do. Tell me what to do! 😢
I think I may have convinced myself that I can predict the future
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A kid in the shops walked past me shouting "I LOVE BIG COOKIE!". I know how ya feel, kid.
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"Who the hell needs a drink & drugs when you've got music?" by @tomofromearth
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Football would be more entertaining if the ball was filled with bees
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Imma go hang on beta.vyrt.com/live/mars-summ… RIGHT NOW. PS. THE DOWNLOAD AND AUDIO ARE LIVE!
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@troyesivan You make my day. I love watching your videos. How do you come up with some of the ideas for videos? They're Just so random :)
you know when you know someone who is literally the definition of boring, like they're the type to buy unfrosted poptarts like WHAT ARE YOU
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I have a new home page here twiends.com/smithsmile123 - check me out!
I think @PatrickStump should use this whenever he doesn't know how to reply one of his fans pic.twitter.com/bYqtAdYMcK
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I love being strange it makes life exciting
once i killed a mosquito and the blood that it had sucked splashed everywhere and i never felt more hardcore in my entire life
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you don't simply start watching fall out boy interviews without watching 100 more plus moustachette
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Status: Sick Advice about Status: don't get sick Results on advice: not being sick pic.twitter.com/mvGRh15JWP