Please upgrade your browser to make full use of twiends.   chrome   firefox   ie   safari  
Want your own social home page like this one? Click here.
movies karate batman martialarts 2,378 followers
If I'm not getting your work, We're not going to make it work.
If you don't end up where you wanted to be then you didn't want to go there enough.
Retweeted by MelancholicWolverine
The shower head is broken, use the bidet.
“To weep is to make less the depth of grief.” ― William Shakespeare
The Walking Dead in 3, 2, 1...
Then again, UFC should create a has beens and novelty divisions.
Sometimes we take a whiff at our shoes after coming from work just to check if it smells bad.
Did you know that there are more chickens than people in the world? What if one day they decide to be brave?
Never leave an unfinished cup of coffee, it will find its way to your white coat.
Admit it. Your reason for watching Game of Thrones has absolutely nothing to do with that little guy with the big junk.
Why do lonely people have 2 phones? So they could put one on vibrate, sit on it and call it with the other one all day.
So you don't like farts. Cover your ears.
It's 8am on a friday weekend . Wake me up when it's 5pm. I'll eat breakfast.
Real friends will tell you if you stink, The rest will just avoid you and spread the word.
There's always that roommate who stinks a lot, that roommate who sleeps a lot, and I'm the one who farts a lot.
Lena Dunham is my sexy fat girl.
Fruit Ninja. Queer Assassin
My humor is as dry as an armpit with anti-perspirant.
Start your day with a loud fart. It's like a ship leaving the dock.
If only I had sideburns, my life would've been complete.
Twitter be notifying me about irrelevant shit. Bitch idc if Matt followed Tommy 🚷🚷👿
Retweeted by MelancholicWolverine
Why is it everybody decides to look for you when you badly need to go to the toilet?
Who will buy a sinking ship? It 's one who has the vision to turn the ship into an artificial reef.