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Shit On Your Tweet
Laugh at the world. It's the only way to survive it.
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First law of all laws. Never show weakness
Where are the Ozil is the pass master tweets now Arsenal fans?
Y'all shoulda just bought Adrian from West Ham instead.
Kenyan house music is still 2010.
Your pubes are showing on your last selfie.
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What in the ever living fuck are you talking about?
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Cc @drizzy_moray RT @ShitBEGone: Shout out to anyone who already used their FPL chips this game week.
Shout out to anyone who already used their FPL chips this game week.
Let's make a Maybe - A confused person probably
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Kenyan girls get so confused when real house music plays.
I swear FPL is harder than single parenting.
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RT @bwrca: You can't wear a shirt with the words 'Yokohama tyres' written across your tits and expect to win shit.
You can't know how good at texting you are until you go to a bash with your girl with a useless Dj.
#mufc XI: Romero; Darmian, Smalling, Blind, Shaw; Carrick, Memphis, Schneiderlin; Mata, Rooney, Young.
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Kenyans are just something else, they religiously follow their politicians and worship their opinions.
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Hatespeech RT @drizzy_moray: .@GoonerKaranja Lol. Valencia is a loner, just like Kevoh. @ShitBEGone @PitchImpression
give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. teach a man theres plenty of fish in the sea but for som reason he still wont get over janice
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[to astronaut brother] Ooooh la la Gary's going to SPACE *does jerkoff motion* I'll be here on EARTH where my pizza & tv won't FLOAT AWAY
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Look guys i thought a gangbang was where we all played drums together, i don't want any part of whatever's happening here
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I feel like when life gives me lemons I just give them back because I hate holding stuff.
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Drunkards>Kenyan Politicians
Anyone here knows how to fill Rental income tax returns?
No wonder people are racist against Africans. That salgaa shit was primitive as fuck
GOT gives more jobs than the Govt of Kenya
What is Milner smoking?
Grealish is as overrated as? A. Januzaj B. Welbeck
(I come back my wife, panting) You sure you don’t want to play in the ball pit? “This is the last time you choose our Anniversary dinner.”
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I hate when I’m on the treadmill and my hand accidentally hits the stop button & I have to get off and eat a bacon grilled cheese sandwich.
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Reports are that he went to Russia, given a horse and told to take it as far as it can go and all the land he stumbles upon is his.
Sepp Blatter got to be guilty though.
I assumed bulletproof vests had pockets for extra badass stuff. Well I just saw an officer pull a granola bar out of one so it's true.
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The ref just told Lescott "Shut up Meg" Cause he's ugly.
Apparently south Africa has a King
With the shit Nigerian adverts it is safe to assume Nigerian chicks are easy cause its pretty easy to Amuse Nigerians.
I would take Varane over Hummel's anytime.. Actually I wouldn't even take Hummel's at all.
Boo and Beer. Don't get better than that...🍻 💏
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I would quit but you see the way my ambition is set up...
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Congratulations to @drizzy_moray for taking a technical lead in the Loyal To The Game #FPL league. Enjoy the temporary stay at the top, son
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Gays should stick to just fishing for complements elsewhere.
I think gays should be banned from writing/directing/producing TV series. I was just about starting to like Tyrant.
De Gea needs to be dropped.
Why isnt anyone mentioning how useless De Gea has been for us in the last year.
Unauliza dere mix ni ya DJ mgani anasema ni yake "@hos_utd: Unaingia jav unashow msee ako next seat wewe ni DJ anakushow pia yeye ......"
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If you think about it as a Holland fan, you'd rather you meet Brazil at the Final cause honestly they're just shit.
A good thing about dating a vegan is that you could kill 2 birds with 1 stone when you buy flowers because they're also a snack for later.
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