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Tiberius Aziz
I see why people don't like to excersise , it's almost the same as a suicide attempt
I just ran on the running machine in my utility room. I came back in my house 90% confident I was going to go into cardiac arrest
This animal psychic said she spoke to Cecil the lion. Um... i100.io/ivPm0eX
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Work experience has actually made me suicidal
Russian hero cop rams his car into oncoming vehicle to save lives of 300 children on.rt.com/6nvh
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Raised eyebrows among party activists, as Tony Blair claims Jeremy Corbyn could destroy Labour party "within 45 minutes".
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It's just unneeded stress
Actually hate driving lessons when am I ever going to need to drive
Seriously though who hides things under their mattress
What's the point in making another Jurassic World, studios have just got so greedy their no longer even creative
School leavers burning books caused power cuts across Essex trib.al/ej9Kv3L
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"What to you call a fish with no eyes?" "A predictable consequence of the callous underfunding of the environment agency"
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What does the label in a Essex girl's knickers say? "Made in Cambodia by exploited children for the benefit of the west's throwaway culture"
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"Jeremy, there's a fly in my soup" "The world has far greater problems than that. I suggest you read this pamphlet on solidarity with Gaza"
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"How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?" "One. It's a fairly mundane operation. Do you have a more relevant question?"
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Chinese man builds fake police station at home, pretends to be cop for 2 yrs on.rt.com/6nep
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What the hell have the police done to Wilmslow road, kill joys
They planted #Zionist regime in the region to sow discord among Muslims and engage them with internal conflicts.
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As schools break up for summer, girls across the UK are going to vanish i100.io/cgLiL2M
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EID IS TOMORROW GUYS
NASA has reached Pluto but we still can't agree on what day Eid is.
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Finding out your 'friends' went to Nando's without you…
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What Eurozone leaders said after leaving 15 hours of Greek crisis talks i100.io/w40ToeY
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Muslims I'm just gonna leave this here for you lot.💯h
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Just had my first driving lesson. Driving is hard
Playing the "I'm fasting I can't" card
The EU stereotype chart is very revealing i100.io/GBz1gr
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I tried to sleep for 4 hours in a room that is 33 degrees Celsius. Not only didn't I sleep but now I'm dehydrated
After re-defining child poverty, Tories will change fox hunting to ‘orange rat extermination’ and rename income support ‘scrounger cash’.
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Queen appeals for European unity. Queen sees gift from German President. Queen bricks up chunnel and re-arms Lancaster bombers.
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Sturridge signed new 3 year contact with NHS! 😀😀😀
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I just woke up and thought it was Saturday
Ngl I really liked this years sports day
Twitter is literally littered with bitching and indirects constantly
Oh, you're 17 and miss the 90s? Yeah, I'm sure those were the best two years of your life. Shitting in your pants and eating crayons
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If I had to describe this year with a phrase "Pointless Childish Drama" comes to mind
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Breaking: Legendary actor Christopher Lee has died at the age of 93 ind.pn/1B4Qj9k
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Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip at the horse races during their 1968 Commonwealth tour
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In a candid moment, Angela Merkel admits that, like many people, she expected greater things from the U.S. President.
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Hypocrite Russell Brand's trendy tops are made in Bangladesh sweatshop dailym.ai/1QdPgL3
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