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Sam Merrow
160 followers
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I'm gonna sit by myself at lunch because I have no friends in it
we got a nude guy in my living room. "Big dick" and he's "DIZZZAAAYY" pic.twitter.com/DT9SC4TJB0
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"Was upset about nutting in 30 seconds till I saw her with the lights on. #getmeout #dodgedabullet" - Penn State
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hockey players are where it's at 😍
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i will do a lot of things but admitting im cold to my mom who told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them
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"Girl wanted me to talk dirty to her. The next time we fucked I said " yeah, you like that..fucking retard?.." No more sex after that."
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THIS JUST IN: BARACK OBAMA'S REAL BIRTH CERTIFICATE HAS FINALLY BEEN RELEASED TO THE PUBLIC. pic.twitter.com/gWmzaIJhll
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"Hooked up with a girl. She waited until we got back to her place to tell me she is saving herself for marriage. Just my luck." - Penn State
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You're sooo Sweeet. Definition: Friendzoned.
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Facial expressions say it all 😂�pic.twitter.com/OKVloCYdWzWz
Me: im finally happy.... Life: LOL, wait a sec..
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5000 retweets and ill sing the anthem at the game tomorrow
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OK IF UR IN MIDDLE SCHOOL U GO TO RENTON IF UR IN HIGHSCHOOL YOU GO TO HURON.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't see shit
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When ur wearing shorts and you sit down and your thighs suddenly expand to the size of texas
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MAKE HIM PAY!!!! EVERY RETWEET= 10 Cents donated to ALS!!!!!!👌🙏pic.twitter.com/wQv0IhonNWnNW
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Walked 18 miles to my girlfriends house last night just to see her
"At the moment I have a dip in,I'm taking a dump, and drinking a beer. I'm a girl :)" - Hutchinson community college
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Hockey is what helps me get through life 💙👌
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"Cops with tear gas can't stop the party #turnup" - Central Michigan University
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Bubba was my best good friend. I had to make sure he was okay.
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Don't want to be embarrassed when buying something? Buy a birthday card with it.
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Girls that know and understand hockey are keepers. 😍
Ariana must have sucked hella dick to get all that performance time.
Retweeted by Sam Merrow