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Jon Richardson
Thank God they haven't sold out! I've got some real tossers coming for dinner and haven't cooked anything! #waitrose
Finally a good news story! Sounds like a lovely day out for the kids with a very tasty ending...
This game of Toilet Poker is well and truly over now - I've hit the jackpot! Read 'em and wee...
"Where should we advertise?" "Wherever the brightest young minds are looking." "Leave it with me." #shapeyourfuture
So ends the long month of Movember. Sorry to lose this whopper, but time for Cardigancember. #testosterone
In my day it was just, "Squeeze my hand and hear me talk!" #generationsex
Harry Enfield with a perfect spoof of Steph and Dom from Gogglebox, 20 years before Gogglebox. Amazing.
In the meantime, here's a peek at the next show poster for @mattforde, "Twat In A Hat".
Having recorded my first DVD here, I can't help but feel responsible. Harsh review though.
Who knew BBC News was the place to get car cutlery storage ideas? This man could teach me so much!
I imagine the recipe for these makes for pretty disgusting reading.
Meet Dougie The Depressed Digger. If we can't make him happy soon, there'll be no Wiggleton Village Fayre!
First Christmas advert. October the 8th. Naughty Morrison's.
Autumnal dew on a spider's web in my garden. No joke attached, feel free to make up your own.
When you have to put up a sign, the war is lost. The Dog And Sex Pest has really gone downhill.
A career highlight somewhat blighted by the fact that Kevin is clearly not a fan. Sad times.
It's out, but the shower still won't come on. I'll call reception...
"And first prize at this year's Faversham Phallic Flower Fiesta goes to..."
"Steve, I worry our product only appeals to men over 70." "Bullshit, Alan! Just put a ripped guy on the box. Idiot."
Classic hand dryer. No bells and whistles, just gets the job done. Bravo.
This week Jesus appeared to me as a piece of seaweed in Northumberland. Brace yourselves, he's a Cocker Spaniel.