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Rachel Anton
Conspiracy: zoombinis are playing us on the computer
A chef's promise: you won't find a better spatula than the Grillary Clinton.
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
Rach: "'Black girls body rolling' is my favorite exercise video" *watches whole video for pure enjoyment and doesn't follow along*
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
Banned from wearing jeans @ work. Lost mom's dress pants tht ive been wearing instead. Now wearing the suit pants from my Mark Klein costume
BREAKING UPDATE: US Supreme Court rules same-sex couples have constitutional right to marry:
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
"A severed ear that can still hear what's going on around it"
"I was havin a good conversation w her up until I made a wrong turn" "Oh no did u bring up her ex?" "No I turned into the wrong parking lot"
In the past few days I've had multiple experiences/conversations that I could definitely sell 2 the producers of iCarly for some serious $$$
"Let me hide my beer. You're not gonna post this on Twitter and get me fired are you?"
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
Me: "Hi how are u" Construction guy: "better than your bumper, that's for sure"
U know what's better than driving into the curb? Driving into the curb in front of a bunch of construction guys
This is the day that Matt Child changes his name to Matt Adult
Always ask yourself: what would Steve Irwin do
U haven't gone on a real life scavenger hunt until u have to search thru trash cans and bins of food for an elderly woman's teeth
Me: "Are u pumped for the 4th of July" Rach: "oh yeah when is that"
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
I'd still let Hope Solo punch me in the face.
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
If I ever get arrested I hope it's by dog the bounty hunter
If u know me then u kno that my heart is broken rn
Elementary school boy at park: hi Me: hey Him: no, the other girl *points at Megan*
A Double-Amputee Soldier Did NOT Lose The ESPN Courage Award To Caitlyn Jenner
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
@Rachel_Anton2 team #window obv its where the teachers sneak out to smoke on the roof
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
Someone needs to make a CR north conspiracy theories Twitter account
Ceiling of the library- is this a #window or #light?- note that this is the 2nd floor so there's a floor above- HELP!
He has a Wikipedia page dedicated to him
Had a gut feeling that my elderly English sub was some kind of prodigy in his day so I looked him up and
He has his priorities straight
Dad just called me from Burger King to tell me to tape the bachelorette for him
Walked up to who I thought was my mom in a store and started my story off with "A fat black lady" before I realized it wasn't her
*wearing a dress made of sweatpants*
Retweeted by Rachel Anton
If the world lived by the words of the Arthur theme song everything would be ok!!
Guys quiet down about the party, there's a tyler state park ranger right there

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