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I'm sorry I took your daughters virginity it wouldn't happen again
English teachers can either be the coolest teacher you ever had or the worst thing ever
There is a difference between being high and being stoned
Someone hangout with me I'm bored af
Retweeted by ☹JESUS☹
I want a alien friend
@LadiesLoveJesus we're gonna die tonight 😏 we're gonna die tonight
Retweeted by ☹JESUS☹
Don't forget about me
"why am i so cold?" i ask myself as i continue to drink cold beverages
Guys, guys, it's okay, the referee couldn't blow his whistle because there's a huge dick in his mouth.
Retweeted by ☹JESUS☹
Why you gotta be so rude, don't you know I'm human too
Im always suspicious of anyone at first that finds me attractive
I feel like me and @hawaiinshirts would be Bros
I love looking better than everyone at the gas station
the problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren’t me
are you ever looking at weird stuff on the internet and ur paranoid its going to end up on fb somehow because fb is connected to everything
Feels like the summer days are going by faster and faster