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MJ Krey
Get Donald into the top 10 so he’s in the GOP debates. If polled, say you’re voting Trump! #Trumpthedebate RT
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Oh, and let George Miller direct the Indiana Jones reboot. PLEASE. #MadMax #WishfulThinking
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Wayward Pines is turning into the new Lost and I'm okay with that.
Is it me? I think it's me. It's me, isn't it. RT @ScienceFiction: Here's Who Won't Be Playing Marvel's Spider-Man
"Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?" -Mitch Hedberg
If you tweet a pic of a bunch of words, you're cheating at Twitter. 140 or GTFO.
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I automatically bypass any headline that starts "Sarah Palin says..."
What about his victims?RT @TIME: Josh Duggar’s parents are ‘devastated’ by the molestation allegations against their son.
Yes, Kris Jenner, it's all about you, you selfish, self-absorbed vomit puddle.
Basically talked for a half hour and have nothing to show for it.
Nothing like recording a podcast with your brother for 30 min then realizing your recording app makes you press 2 buttons to record.
Has anyone made a joke about Sepp Blatter's name yet? It sounds funny! Like the place pee comes from.
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Sepp Blatter sounds like the country cousin of Pap Smear.
I don't know, commercials... Is it really that hard to buy damn razor blades?
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NOOOOOOOOOO! RT @TIME: Drinking 4 cups of coffee a day is bad for you, study says
RT @adamtodbrown: Wisconsin: Where no one bats an eyelash if you walk in a store and ask if they have a time machine.
Check out my new blog post -
The American Dream is to get paid a lot to do nothing. Basically, to have the life of a vitamin.
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Gah! Stung by a wasp right between the shoulder blades. Somebody call 911.
Nickleback gets too much shit. A lot of that anger should be directed at Maroon 5. #AmericanNickleback
Read the first chapter of Agents of the Internet Apocalypse. Available for pre-order:
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Congratulations to Ireland. Or as I like to call it Fire Ireland.
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Just felt the need to share that. Also, I can now get 7-8 hours of uninterrupted sleep and my joints no longer hurt.
Watched a Katie Couric doc a few weeks ago called Fed Up and decided to give up sugar and diet sodas. I've lost 8 pounds so far w/o trying
Adblock Plus Releases Standalone Browser That Blocks All Ads
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"9 months later when the family found out the molesting hadn't stopped" Jail for the parents, 19 years and counting.…
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(My favorite movie is still Guardians of the Galaxy, though)
Thank you, @pattonoswalt , for gushing over Mad Max on Twitter. I wouldn't have seen the decade's best action movie otherwise.
Thanks to @jimmypardo and @NeverNotFunny , I have a full on crush on @janetvarney.
What the hell is a 'Back Pitch' and why are so proud to be one? Are they better than front ...
It's embarrassing enough to call yourself "pitches", you forgot the comma, too.
My fav comic as a kid. RT @slashfilm: 'The New Mutants' Developing at Fox.
Oh Em Effing G. RT @TheOnion: In Focus: Breakfast In Bed Served To Mom Who Just Got Eaten Out

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