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MJ Krey

So far, the best thing about the Super Bowl is Twitter.
Hahahahahahaha that baby ripped that vagina open for some Doritos! Take that Klondike bars. #SuperBowl
Retweeted by MJ Krey
What's the over on talking animal commercials?
Am I the only one who laughed at Dorito premie commercial?
"Go online to see the new Jungle Book trailer." But didn't you just show us the new Jungle Book trailer?
You know what? Fuck everyone who lip syncs the National Anthem.
If Marco Rubio had choked any more in the #GOPDebate it would have enhanced his orgasm.
Retweeted by MJ Krey
Why do the high school and college students in 80s comedies look like they're all in their mid thirties?
Few headlines make me more drowsy than "Beyoncé Drops New Single."
Used to spend weekends making out w strange women behind merch tents at Warrant/Slaughter/Jackyl concerts now I'm painting my kitchen.
And yet they won't try to bring Firefly back.…
Oh, good. There hasn't been a medical drama on tv in forever.…
Settled on 1980s Hollywood Knights. Kind of an American Graffiti knockoff with Michelle Pfeiffer, Robert Wuhl, and Tony Danza
Ok Fast Times is done. Any suggestions for another 80s movie tonight?
Ok, Mr Hand is a dick, but how many teachers would show up at a burnout student's house to give him an education? #FTaRH
The cheerleader in #FTaRH played a cheerleader in Night of the Comet and then kind of just disappeared
"Mister, if you don't shut up I'm going to kick 100% of your ass!" #FTaRH
Damone could have played Alex Van Halen in a Lifetime movie about Van Halen. #FTaRH
Holy crap! Anthony Edwards had hair? #FTaRH
Mr Hand IS a dick. #FTaRH
Holy crap, you could smoke in movie theaters? #FTaRH
Taking a trip down Nostalgia Boulevard tonight with Fast Times at Ridgemont High. I've only seen the cable version.
I'll never know what a fish taco tastes like because I'll never be able to order one without giggling uncontrollably
Pfft. They can't fine ya if they can't find 'em.…
Stupid link didn't paste right, now I'm late for work. But trust me, Wall Street is pissing itself over Sanders' strong showing in Iowa.
Goldman Sachs just turned me into a Bernie supporter. Wall Street is so scared of him he must be ...
What if Hitler in our past is the "better" timeline. Like, future us had time travel and someone went back and killed someone even worse?
Why is Cruz celebrating? He beat a business "mogul" who filed bankruptcy 4 times by only 3 percent.
Ok. What's a caucus? RT @NPR: Let us know what questions you have about the Iowa caucuses.
Yup. RT @jonahray: Just gonna keep watching this forever.
Hey, @WIRED, How on earth can you seriously charge twice as much for a digital-only sub to your magazine?
It's as if Wentworth Miller prepped for the role only by watching The Superfriends Saturday morning cartoon.
Wentworth Miller's ridiculous overacting will cause the cancellation of Legends of Tomorrow if his character isn't killed off quickly.
Peyton Manning is the one who should HAVE bangs. RT @anylaurie16: I forget, is Peyton the Manning I want to bang?
Dear #Cadillac, Sheep don't follow the herd. Sheep travel in flocks. #denvsne
After the game they're going to screen the movie "Concussion" on Peyton Manning's forehead. #NEvsDEN
Retweeted by MJ Krey
All food is comfort food.
Next up on TBS, Sledgehammered Punchlines. I'm sorry, I meant 2 Broke Girls.
Saying "I'm super apologetic" isn't the same as saying "I'm sorry." Buck up and take ownership.
Wait wait wait. Are telling me crankbaits don't need LIPS!?!?…
Turned in a rough draft of an essay for Adv Comp class about the time I hit a kid with my dad's car when I was 16 and now I'm wrecked.
I'm excited to start working on our RiffTrax for Samurai Cop. This is why.…
Retweeted by MJ Krey
My thoughts, exactly. I feel so smart.…
Ew. He's like, a hundred years old. RT @Variety: Jennifer Lawrence will play Fidel Castro's lover in a new film
Nope. Still can't sit through Buckaroo Bonzai. I'll never know how this movie ends.
Did you guys know they shot the movie Dune on me?
Retweeted by MJ Krey
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